Adultery -- Fiction; Family -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
She had been very quiet; thinking back to it, he pondered that. It
seemed not alone the quiet that comes with the acceptance of death, the
quiet that is the subduing effect of strange or moving circumstances,
but an inner quiet, a quiet of power. The years had taken something from
Ruth, but Ruth had won much from them. She was worn, a little dimmed,
but deepened. A tragedy queen she was not; he had a little smile for
himself for that subconscious romantic expectation that gave him, just
at the first, a little shock of disappointment when he saw Ruth. A
tragedy queen would hold herself more imposingly--and would have taken
better care of her hands. But that moment of a lighted way between Ruth
and him could let him afford to smile at disappointed romantic
expectation.
He had been there for only a few minutes, having the long trip out in
the country to make. Ruth and Ted seemed to be alone in the house. He
asked her if she had seen Harriett, and she answered, simply, "Not yet."
She had said, "You're married, Deane--and happy. I'm so glad." That,
too, she had said very simply; it was real; direct. As he thought of it
now it was as if life had simplified her; she had let slip from her,
like useless garments, all those blurring artificialities that keep
people apart.
As usual he would go over again that evening to see his patient; and
then he would remain for a visit with Ruth. And he wanted to take Amy
with him. He would not let himself realize just how much he wanted to do
that, how much he would hate not doing it. He was thinking it out,
trying to arrive at the best way of putting it to Amy. If only he could
make it seem to her the simple thing it was to him!
He would be so happy to do this for Ruth, but it was more than that; it
was that he wanted to bring Amy within--within that feeling of his about
Ruth. He wanted her to share in that. He could not bear to leave it a
thing from which she was apart, to which she was hostile. He could not
have said just why he felt it so important Amy become a part of what he
felt about Ruth.
When at last they were together over their unusually late dinner the
thing he wanted to say seemed to grow more difficult because Amy was so
much dressed up. In her gown of that afternoon she looked so much the
society person that what he had in mind somehow grew less simple. And
there was that in her manner too--like her clothes it seemed a society
manner--to make it less easy to attempt to take her into things outside
the conventional round of life. He felt a little helpless before this
self-contained, lovely young person. She did not seem easy to get at.
Somehow she seemed to be apart from him. There was a real wistfulness in
his desire to take her into what to him were things real and important.
It seemed if he could not do that now that Amy would always be a little
apart from him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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