Cards added this because he knew that Peter had a curious passion for
being liked. Cards wanted to be admired, but to be liked!... what was
the gain? But that second year was, in spite of it all, the best
time that Peter had ever had. There was warmth of a kind in their
appreciation of him. He was only fifteen and small for his age, but his
uncompromising attitude about things, his silence, his football, gave
him a surprising importance--but even now it was respect rather than
popularity. He was growing more like a bull-dog than ever, his hair was
stiff and short, rather shaggy eyebrows, a square jaw, his short legs
rather far apart, a broad back and thick strong arms.
Now that Stephen had slipped so sadly into the background he built up
his life about Cards. He put everything into that room--not the old room
that had held Stephen, but a new shining place that gained some added
brilliance from the fact that its guest realised so little the honour
that was done him. He would lie awake at night and think about Cards, of
the things that he would do for him, of the way that he would serve him,
of the guardian that he would be.
And then, as that summer term, at the end of the second year, wore on
the pain of Cards' departure grew daily more terrible. He didn't know,
as the days advanced, how he would be able to bear that place without
Cards. There would be no life, no interest, and all the disorganisation,
the immorality, the cruelty would oppress him as they had never
oppressed him before. Besides next year he would be a person of
some importance--he would probably be Captain of the Football and a
Monitor...everything would be terribly hard. Of course there was old
Bobby Galleon, who was a very good chap and really fond of Peter, but
there was no excitement about _that_ relationship. Bobby was quite ready
to play servant to Peter's master, and Peter could never respect any one
very much who did that. Beside Cards, so brilliant, so handsome, with
such an “air,” old Bobby really didn't come off very well.
Bobby also at times was inclined to be a little sentimental. He used
to ask Peter whether he liked him--whether he would miss him if he
died--and he used to tell Peter that he would very gladly die for him.
There were things that one didn't--if one had self-respect--say.
That year the summer was of a blazing heat. Every morning saw a sky
of steely blue, the corn stood like a golden band about the hills, and
little clouds like the softest feathers were blown by the Gods about the
world. A mist clung about the distant hills and clothed them in purple
grey. As the term grew to its close Peter felt that the world was a
prison of coloured steel, and that Dawson's was a true Hell...he would
escape from it with Cards. And then when he saw that such an escape
would be running away and a confession of defeat--he turned back and
held his will in command.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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