As the dog to his vomit, the sow to her mire, You will glide, the born slave of your fiendish desire; By my oath, it’s a sin, a disgrace, and a shame; With your shoulders so broad, and so robust your frame, With your arms like a Hercules, muscled and strong, With your wind like a stag-hound’s, so perfect and long, To earn a support you’re possessed of all means— And yet you’ve been stealing a box of sardines. [Illustration: THE JUDGE.] “I have worked my way onward, year out and year in, Among characters blackened and blistered with sin; Amongst men I’d have quaked to have met in a lane, As I would the arch demon, relieved of his chain; But I’m frank to confess, and I’d state it as free On a Bible as large as a bed, if need be, In my thirty years’ practice, on Bench or at Bar, A thief more consummate and bold than you are I have never encountered, in county or town, Among whites, copper-colored, or greasers done brown; You’re as prone to purloin as an eagle to fly, Or a salmon to swim, or a lover to sigh; Not an esculent known, or utensil of use, From a cantaloupe down to the quill of a goose, From a tripe in the stall to a fowl in the coop, But at some time or other in your life you did scoop.” And as if in assent, Richard Roe bowed his head, While the Judge wiped his face, and continuing, said: “Here so often, of late, you have taken the stand, To give answer for larcenies, petty or grand, That your face has become as familiar to all The practitioners here as the clock on the wall;” Here he pointed it out, and a glance at it threw; And bold Richard turned round and regarded it too, While full back to his ears a grim smile slowly broke, For, despite his position, he relished the joke. “I regret that our law draws the limiting line, For it seems but a farce to impose a small fine, Or to send you below for a week or ten days, To recline on a mat and hatch future forays. “But since neither the gloom of the prison, nor fine, Seems to work a reform in that bosom of thine, I will try a new method—throw justice one side, And appeal to your manhood, your honor, and pride; It is said kindness conquers where knuckles will fail, And a pardon may faster reform than the jail; Since the stock-raiser advocates crossing the breed, And the farmer finds profit by changing the seed, Who can tell but a change may regenerate you— So we offer you mercy where none is your due.