"Gentlemen prefer blondes" : $b The illuminating diary of a professional ladyLoos, Anita
General
"Gentlemen prefer blondes" : $b The illuminating diary of a professional lady
Loos, Anita
Diary fiction; Humorous stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Millionaires -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
So yesterday morning Dorothy sold the imitation of a diamond tiara to
Louie. So then we got it back. So in the afternoon we all went out to
Versigh. I mean Louie and Robber were quite delighted not to go
shopping any more so I suppose that Lady Francis Beekman really thinks
that there is a limit to almost everything. So I took Louie for a walk
at Versigh so that Dorothy would have a chance to sell it to Robber. So
then she sold it to Robber. So then he put it in his pocket. But when
we were coming home I got to thinking things over and I really got to
thinking that an imitation of a diamond tiara was quite a good thing to
have after all. I mean especially if a girl goes around a lot in Paris,
with admirers who are of the French extraction. And after all, I really
do not think a girl ought to encouradge Robber to steal something from
two American girls who are all alone in Paris and have no gentleman to
protect them. So I asked Dorothy which pocket Robber put it in, so I
sat next to him in the automobile coming home and I took it out.
So we were in quite a quaint restaurant for dinner when Robber put his
hand in his pocket and then he started in to squeal once more. So it
seems he had lost something, so he and Louie had one of their regular
squealing and shoulder shrugging matches. But Louie told his papa that
he did not steal it out of his papa’s pocket. But then Robber started
in to cry to think that his son would steal something out of his own
papa’s pocket. So after Dorothy and I had had about all we could stand,
I told them all about it. I mean I really felt sorry for Robber so I
told him not to cry any more because it was nothing but paste after
all. So then I showed it to them. So then Louie and Robber looked at
Dorothy and I and they really held their breath. So I suppose that most
of the girls in Paris do not have such brains as we American girls.
So after it was all over, Louie and Robber seemed to be so depressed
that I really felt sorry for them. So I got an idea. So I told them
that we would all go out tomorrow to the imitation of a jewelry store
and they could buy another imitation of a diamond tiara to give to Lady
Francis Beekman and they could get the man in the jewelry store to put
on the bill that it was a hand bag and they could charge the bill to
Lady Francis Beekman along with the other expenses. Because Lady
Francis Beekman had never seen the real diamond tiara anyway. So
Dorothy spoke up and Dorothy said that as far as Lady Francis Beekman
would know about diamonds, you could nick off a piece of ice and give
it to her, only it would melt. So then Robber looked at me and looked
at me, and he reached over and kissed me on the forehead in a way that
was really full of reverance.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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