My father frowned; seeing, however, that in this way he could not bring
me to terms, he chose another. He smiled under his gray mustache, half
closed one eye, in the fashion of a soldier, took me gently by the ear,
and asked, as if joking,--
"But has Hania, perhaps, turned thine own head? Speak, my boy."
"Hania? Not in the least. That would amuse thee."
I lied as if possessed; but it passed off more smoothly than I had
expected.
"Then has not Lola Ustrytski? Hei?"
"Lola Ustrytski, a coquette!"
My father became impatient.
"Then what the devil is it? If thou art not in love, go as a soldier to
the first muster."
"Do I know what the matter is? Nothing is the matter with me."
But I was tormented and made more impatient by questions which in their
anxiety neither my father nor the priest spared, nor even Pani d'Yves.
At last relations with them became disagreeable. I was carried away by
everything and enraged at every trifle. Father Ludvik saw in this
certain traits of a despotic character coming to the surface with age,
and looking at my father significantly he laughed and said,--
"Topknot chickens by blood!"
But even he lost patience sometimes. Between my father and me there were
frequently very disagreeable passages. Once at dinner during a dispute
about nobility and democracy I so forgot myself as to declare that I
should prefer a hundred times not to be born a noble. My father ordered
me to leave the room. The women fell to crying because of this, and the
whole house was embittered for two days.
As to me, I was neither an aristocrat nor a democrat; I was simply in
love and unhappy. There was no place in me whatever for principles,
theories, or social convictions; and if I fought in the name of some
against others, I did so only through vexation, to annoy it is unknown
whom or why, just as I began religious disputes with Father Ludvik to
annoy him. These disputes ended with slamming of doors. In short, I
poisoned not the existence of myself only, but that of the whole house;
and when after ten days Selim returned, a stone, as it were, fell from
every one's breast. When he came I was not at home, for I was racing
about through the neighborhood on horseback. I returned only toward
evening and went straight to the farm buildings, where a stable-boy
said, while taking my horse,--
"The Panich has come from Horeli."
At that moment Kazio came up and repeated the same news.
"I know that already," answered I, harshly. "Where is Selim now?"
"In the garden with Hania, I think. I will go and look for him."
We both went to the garden, but Kazio ran ahead. I, not hurrying
purposely with the greeting, had not gone fifty steps when, at the bend
of the alley, I saw Kazio hastening back.
Kazio, who was a great rogue and a joker, began from afar to make
gestures and grimaces like a monkey. His face was red; he held his
finger to his mouth and laughed, stifling laughter at the same time.
When he came up to me he called in a low voice,--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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