“Well, Izhe _goin’_ to be dead some day, an’ zen your nashty old goat sha’n’t see me a bit—see how he like _zat_.” And Toddie made a ferocious attack on a slice of melon nearly as large as himself. After lunch, Toddie was sent to his room to take his afternoon nap, and Budge went to the barn on my shoulders. I gave Mike a dollar, with instructions to keep Budge in sight, to keep him from teasing the goat, and to prevent his being impaled or butted. Then I stretched myself on a lounge and wondered whether only half a day of daylight had elapsed since I and the most adorable woman in the world had been so happy together. How much happier I would be when next I met her! The very torments of this rainy day would make my joy seem all the dearer and more intense. I dreamed happily for a few moments with my eyes open, and then somehow they closed, without my knowledge. What put into my mind the wreck scene from the play of “David Copperfield,” I don’t know; but there it came, and in my dream I was sitting in the balcony at Booth’s, and taking a proper interest in the scene, when it occurred to me that the thunder had less of reverberation and more woodenness than good stage thunder should have. The mental exertion I underwent on this subject disturbed the course of my nap, but as wakefulness returned, the sound of the poorly simulated thunder did not cease; on the contrary, it was just as noisy, and more hopelessly a counterfeit than ever. What could the sound be? I stepped through the window to the piazza, and the sound was directly over my head. I sprang down the terrace and out upon the lawn, looked up, and beheld my youngest nephew strutting back and forth on the tin roof of the piazza, holding over his head a ragged old parasol. I roared:—“Go in, Toddie—this instant!” The sound of my voice startled the young man so severely that he lost his footing, fell, and began to roll toward the edge and to scream, both operations being performed with great rapidity. I ran to catch him as he fell, but the outer edge of the water trough was high enough to arrest his progress, though it had no effect in reducing the volume of his howls. “Toddie,” I shouted, “lie perfectly still until uncle can get to you! Do you hear?” “Ess, but don’t want to lie ’till,” came in reply from the roof. ”’Tan’t shee noffin’ but sky an’ wain.” [Illustration: HOLDING OVER HIS HEAD A RAGGED PARASOL] “Lie still,” I reiterated, “or I’ll whip you dreadfully.” Then I dashed upstairs, removed my shoes, climbed out and rescued Toddie, shook him soundly, and then shook myself. “I wash only djust pyayin mamma, an’ walkin’ in ze wain wif an umbayalla,” Toddie explained.