Eccentrics and eccentricities -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
A peace so profound as to be almost unnatural had settled over the land,
one or two stars had come out, and I wondered vaguely why Amos and his
people had not yet returned home from work. I supposed that they were
making the most of a fine evening. The Pennistans would accept their
daughter’s defeat, I was sure, with the usual stoic indifference of the
poor. At last I turned slowly in the doorway, a great melancholy soaking
like dew into my bones, so that I fancied I felt the physical ache.
Now I have but the one concluding incident to tell, before I have done
with this portion of my cumbersome, disjointed story, an incident which
has since appeared to me frightening in its appositeness, as though
deliberately planned by some diabolically finished artist as a rounding
of the whole. Malory had spoken of destiny and nature as being the only
artists of any humour or courage, and upon my soul I am tempted to agree
with him when I think over the events of that packed evening, of which I
was the sole and baffled spectator. I said this incident appeared to me
frightening; I repeat that statement, for I can conceive of no situation
more frightening than for a man to find himself and other human beings
shoved hither and thither by events over which he has no control
whatsoever, the conduct of life taken entirely out of his hands,
especially a man, like me, had always struggled resentfully against the
imposition of fate on free-will, but never more so than in the past few
weeks. Wherever I turned that night, mockery was there ready to greet
me.
I went again, as I have said, into the house with the intention of
waiting in the kitchen on Amos’s return. In this small plan as in my
larger ones I was, it appeared, to be thwarted, for as I passed down the
narrow passage I noticed that the door of old Mrs. Pennistan’s room was
open. I paused at first with no thought of alarm. I longed to go in, and
to tell the ancient woman of the futile suffering she had brought upon
her hapless descendants. I longed insanely to shout it into her brain
and to see remorse wake to life in her faded eyes. As I stood near her
door she grew for me into a huge, portentous figure, she and her love
for Oliver Pennistan, and I saw her, the tiny woman I had all but
forgotten, as a consciously evil spirit, a malign influence, the spring
from which all this river of sorrow had flowed. Then my steps were drawn
nearer and nearer to the door, till I stood at last on the threshold,
looking for the first time into the room. Some one, presumably the now
invisible servant, had lit the two candles on the dressing-table, and
these with the glow of the fire between the bars threw over the room a
fitful light. I had, curiously enough, no sense of intrusion; I might
have been looking at a mummy. Yet I should have remembered that the
occupant was not a mummy, for the familiar smell of the chestnuts had
greeted me even in the passage.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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