How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to MarriageHardy, E. J. (Edward John)
General
How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to Marriage
Hardy, E. J. (Edward John)
Marriage
The possibility of a hitch arising from a sudden change of inclination
on the part of the principals is ludicrously illustrated by the case of
two couples who on one occasion presented themselves at the Mayoralty,
in a suburb of Paris, to carry out the civil portion of their marriage
contract. During the ceremony one of the bridegrooms saw, or fancied he
saw, his partner making "sheep's-eyes" at the bridegroom opposite. Being
of a jealous temperament, he laid his hand roughly on her arm, and said
sharply: "Mademoiselle, which of the two brides are you? You are mine, I
believe: then oblige me by confining your glances to me." The bride was
a young woman of spirit, and resenting the tone in which the reprimand
was made, retorted: "Ah, Monsieur, if you are jealous already, I am
likely to lead a pleasant life with you!" The jealous bridegroom made an
angry reply; and then the other bridegroom must needs put his oar in.
This led to a general dispute, which the Mayor in vain endeavoured to
quell. The bridegrooms stormed at each other; and the brides, between
their hysterical sobs, mutually accused each other of perfidy. At length
the Mayor, as a last resource, adjourned the ceremony for half an hour,
to admit of an amicable understanding being arrived at, both brides
having refused to proceed with the celebration of the nuptials. When, at
the expiration of the half-hour, the parties were summoned to reappear,
they did so, to the amazement of the bewildered Mayor, in an altogether
different order from that in which they had originally entered. The
bridegrooms had literally effected an exchange of brides--the jealous
bridegroom taking the jealous bride; and the other, the lady whose
fickle glances had led to the rupture. All four adhering to the new
arrangement, the Mayor, it is recorded, had no alternative but to
proceed with the ceremony.
The ruling passion is not more strongly felt in death than in marriage.
Dr. Johnson displayed the sturdiness of his character as he journeyed
with the lady of his choice from Birmingham to Derby, at which last
place they were to be married. Their ride thither, which we give in the
bridegroom's own words, is an amusing bit of literary history. "Sir, she
had read the old romances, and had got into her head the fantastical
notion that a woman of spirit should use her lover like a dog. So, sir,
at first she told me that I rode too fast, and she could not keep up
with me: and when I rode a little slower, she passed me, and complained
that I lagged behind. I was not to be made the slave of caprice; and I
resolved to begin as I meant to end. I therefore pushed on briskly, till
I was fairly out of her sight. The road lay between two hedges, so I was
sure she could not miss it; and I contrived that she should soon come up
with me. When she did, I observed her to be in tears."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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