[26.] Some Gentlemen were sitting at a Coffee-house together, one was asking what News there was? T'other told him, There was forty thousand Men rose to day, which made them all stare about, and asked him to what end they rose, and what did they intend? Why faith, says he, only to go to bed at Night again. _Of Milo the Glutton._ _Milo_ with haste to cram his greedy gut, [6.] One of his thumbs into the bone had cut. Then straight, it noysed was about by some, That he had lost his stomacke with his thumbe. To which one said. No worse hap fall unto him, But, if a poore man finde it, 'twill undo him. [18.] A Person of Quality owed a Gentleman a Thousand Pounds. Meeting together in a fair Road, where both their Coaches went a good rate; the first looking out of the Coach called to the Gentleman, and begged a thousand Excuses. _And I beg_, said the Gentleman presently, _a thousand Pounds._ A Pleasant new Ballad you here may behold, How the Devill, though subtle, was guld by a Scold. To the Tune of _The Seminary Priest_. [Illustration] Give eare my loving Country-men [31.] that still desire newes, Nor passe not while you heare it sung, or else the song peruse: For ere you heare it, I must tell my newes, it is not common, But Ile unfold a trueth betwixt a Devill and a woman. _Tom Thumb_ is not my subiect, whom Fairies oft did aide, Nor that mad spirit _Robin_ that plagues both wife and maid Nor is my song satyricke like, invented against no man, But onely of a pranke betwixt a Devill and a woman. * * * * * A woman well in yeares liv'd with a husband kinde Who had a great desire to live content in minde, But twas a thing impossible to compasse his desire For night and day with scolding she did her husband tire. With roughish, lowtish clowne, despight thee Ile be wilde, Doest thou think I marryed thee to use thee like a childe, And set thee on my lap, or humour what you speake? Before Ile be so fond, thy very heart Ile breake. Why, loving wife, quoth he, Ile never doe thee wrong, So thoul't be rul'd by me, and onely hold thy tongue. And when I come from worke, wilt please at board and bed; Doe this my loving wife and take all being dead. Marke well, quoth she, my words what ere you speak me to, By faire meanes or by foule, the contrary Ile doe. According to her speech, this man led such a life, That oft he wish't the Devill to come and fetch his wife. Had he bid her goe homely, why then she would goe brave, Had he cal'd her good wife, she cal'd him rogue and slave; Bade he, wife goe to Church, and take the fairest pew, Shee'd goe unto an Alehouse, and drinke, lye downe and spew.