Bigamy -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Mothers -- Fiction; Sisters -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
She was in a pitifully nervous state. She entreated Frances to dress her
again and help her downstairs, so that she could wait there, where, in
case of fire, she could manage somehow to get out. She couldn’t eat
anything for lunch. She sat propped up in bed, her trembling fingers
moving ceaselessly, her watery eyes staring vacantly, in dim anxiety,
consumed with dread, with the horror of her own helplessness. As she
passed by the door, Frances could see her there, each time more
intolerably pitiful. Until, one time, she saw her press her poor,
clawlike hand against her mouth.... Somehow that decided Frances; she
_couldn’t_ leave her; couldn’t endure the idea of her alone there until
two in the morning, when the last train would have brought her back. No;
she couldn’t go. She went into the room, hard and brusque again.
“I won’t go to the city,” she said. “I’ll just harness up Bess somehow
and go to the village and send a telegram.”
All over--all finished. She knew it. She had no hope, no illusion about
the matter, only the certainty that her terribly brief time of happiness
was done.
II
Happiness which existed now only in her memory, in time to grow
incredible even there....
One year!
She remembered very well when she had made that first visit to Miss
Eppendorfer. She had never before been alone in New York, didn’t know
how to find the address, had to ask one policeman after another, and try
in a sort of agony to comprehend the directions they gave. And when she
had arrived, her terror of the unknown city was supplanted by a worse
one; suppose she didn’t get the job, that the authoress didn’t like her,
and she had to return home, shamefully defeated.
She had plenty of time to contemplate this, waiting in the sitting-room
of Miss Eppendorfer’s flat. An insolent coloured girl showed her in and
left her there without a word. She was almost ill from nervousness; she
watched the door without stirring for fifteen minutes or so, then, when
no one came, grew bold enough to look about her. It was a small and
rather dark room, furnished in a style new to her--the ubiquitous
Mission style. Little square chairs of imitation weathered oak, with
imitation leather seats, studded with gilt nails, fit for an authoress
from the Middle West to sit in while she laughed indulgently at
Victorian mahogany. Mock austerity, mock simplicity, a crowd of cheap
and monotonous stuff, all square and squat; plain curtains, bookcases
with sets of books selected always by authorities, and never by the
owner. Replica of a thousand rooms, mirror of a thousand souls, a room
which signified and expressed nothing. It was the first
cheaply-furnished room Frances had ever entered, and she was innocently
impressed with it. The good taste she possessed was not innate, it was
traditional; she wasn’t able to judge the unknown.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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