England -- Fiction; Experimental fiction; Psychological fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- England -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
The sitting-room neither knew nor cared. The door was shut; and to
suppose that wood, when it creaks, transmits anything save that rats are
busy and wood dry is childish. These old houses are only brick and wood,
soaked in human sweat, grained with human dirt. But if the pale blue
envelope lying by the biscuit-box had the feelings of a mother, the
heart was torn by the little creak, the sudden stir. Behind the door was
the obscene thing, the alarming presence, and terror would come over her
as at death, or the birth of a child. Better, perhaps, burst in and face
it than sit in the antechamber listening to the little creak, the sudden
stir, for her heart was swollen, and pain threaded it. My son, my
son--such would be her cry, uttered to hide her vision of him stretched
with Florinda, inexcusable, irrational, in a woman with three children
living at Scarborough. And the fault lay with Florinda. Indeed, when the
door opened and the couple came out, Mrs. Flanders would have flounced
upon her--only it was Jacob who came first, in his dressing-gown,
amiable, authoritative, beautifully healthy, like a baby after an
airing, with an eye clear as running water. Florinda followed, lazily
stretching; yawning a little; arranging her hair at the
looking-glass--while Jacob read his mother's letter.
Let us consider letters--how they come at breakfast, and at night, with
their yellow stamps and their green stamps, immortalized by the
postmark--for to see one's own envelope on another's table is to realize
how soon deeds sever and become alien. Then at last the power of the
mind to quit the body is manifest, and perhaps we fear or hate or wish
annihilated this phantom of ourselves, lying on the table. Still, there
are letters that merely say how dinner's at seven; others ordering coal;
making appointments. The hand in them is scarcely perceptible, let alone
the voice or the scowl. Ah, but when the post knocks and the letter
comes always the miracle seems repeated--speech attempted. Venerable are
letters, infinitely brave, forlorn, and lost.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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