John Bull; Or, The Englishman's Fireside: A Comedy, in Five ActsColman, George
General
John Bull; Or, The Englishman's Fireside: A Comedy, in Five Acts
Colman, George
Comedy plays; English drama
_Pereg._ Hold, sir! When you betrayed the poor, wronged, Mary, how
came you to forget, that every father's repose may be broken for
ever by his child's conduct?
_Frank._ By my honour! by my soul! it was my intention to have
placed her far, far above the reach of want; but you, my hollow
monitor, are frustrating that intention. You, who come here to
preach virtue, are tempting her to be a confirmed votary of vice,
whom I in penitence would rescue, as the victim of unguarded
sensibility.
_Pereg._ Are you, then, jealous of me?
_Frank._ Jealous!
_Pereg._ Aye: if so, I can give you ease. Return with me, to the
injured innocent on the heath: marry her, and I will give her away.
_Frank._ Marry her! I am bound in honour to another.
_Pereg._ Modern honour is a coercive argument; but when you have
seduced virtue, whose injuries you will not solidly repair, you must
be slightly bound in old-fashion'd honesty.
_Frank._ I------I know not what to say to you. Your manner almost
awes me; and there is a mystery in----
_Pereg._ I am mysterious, sir. I may have other business, perhaps,
with your father; and, I will tell you, the very fate of your family
may hang on my conference with him. Come, come, Mr. Rochdale, bring
me to Sir Simon.
_Frank._ My father cannot be seen yet. Will you, for a short time,
remain in my apartment?
_Pereg._ Willingly;--and depend on this, sir--I have seen enough of
the world's weakness, to forgive the casual faults of youthful
indiscretion;--but I have a detestation for systematic vice; and
though, as a general censor, my lash may be feeble, circumstances
have put a scourge in my hand, which may fall heavily on this
family, should any of its branches force me to wield it.--I attend
you. [_Exeunt._
* * * * *
ACT THE FIFTH.
SCENE I.
_A Hall in the Manor-house._
_Voices wrangling without._
_Job._ I will see Sir Simon.
_Simon._ You can't see Sir Simon, &c. &c. &c.
_Enter JOB THORNBERRY, MARY, and SIMON._
_Job._ Don't tell me;--I come upon justice business.
_Simon._ Sir Simon be a gentleman justice.
_Job._ If the justice allows all his servants to be as saucy as you,
I can't say much for the gentleman.
_Simon._ But these ben't his hours.
_Job._ Hours for justice! I thought one of the blessings of an
Englishman, was to find justice at any time.
_Mary._ Pray don't be so----
_Job._ Hold your tongue, child. What _are_ his hours?
_Simon._ Why, from twelve to two.
_Job._ Two hours out of four and twenty! I hope all that belong to
law, are a little quicker than his worship; if not, when a case
wants immediate remedy, it's just eleven to one against us. Don't
you know me?
_Simon._ Na.
_Job._ I'm sure I have seen you in Penzance.
_Simon._ My wife has got a chandler's shop there.
_Job._ Haven't you heard we've a fire engine in the church?
_Simon._ What o' that?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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