John Cheap, the Chapman's Library. Vol. 1: Comic and Humorous: The Scottish Chap Literature of Last Century, ClassifiedGraham, Dougal
General
John Cheap, the Chapman's Library. Vol. 1: Comic and Humorous: The Scottish Chap Literature of Last Century, Classified
Graham, Dougal
Chapbooks, Scottish; English literature -- 18th century; Graham, Dougal, 1724-1779; Popular literature -- Scotland
Two or three days thereafter, as Tom was going down Canongate in
Edinburgh, he meets one of his shearers, who knew and kept fast
by him, demanding back his money, and also satisfaction for the
rest. Whisht, whisht, says Tom and you’ll get yours and something
else beside. So Tom takes him into the jail, and calls for a bottle
of ale and a dram, then takes the jailor aside, as if he had been
going to borrow some money from him; and says to the jailor, this
man is a great thief, I and other two have been in search of him
these three days, and the other two men have the warrant with them;
so if you keep this rogue here till I run and bring them you shall
have a guinea in reward. Yes, says the jailor, go and I’ll secure
the rogue for you. So Tom got off, leaving the poor innocent fellow
and the jailor struggling together, and then sets out for England
directly.
PART IV.
Tom having now left his own native country, went into the county of
Northumberland, where he hired himself to an old miser of a farmer,
where he continued for several years, performing his duty in his
service very well, tho’ sometimes playing tricks on those about
him; but his master had a naughty custom, he would allow them no
candle at night, to see with when at supper. So Tom one night sets
himself next his master, and as they were all about to fall on,
Tom puts his spoon into the heart of the dish, where the crowdy
was hottest, and claps a spoonful into his master’s mouth. A pox
on you for a rogue, cried his master, for my mouth is all burnt. A
pox on you for a master, says Tom, for you keep a house as dark as
Purgatory, for I was going to my mouth with the soup, and missed
the way, it being so dark, don’t think master, that I am such a big
fool as to feed you while I have a mouth of my own. So from that
night that Tom burnt his master’s mouth with the hot crowdy, they
always got a candle to show them light at supper, for his master
would feed no more in the dark while Tom was present.
There was a servant girl in the house, who always when she made the
beds, neglected to make Tom’s, and would have him do it himself.
Well then, says Tom, I have harder work to do, and I shall do that
too. So next day when Tom was at the plough, he saw his master
coming from the house towards him, he left the horses and the
plough standing in the field, and goes away towards his master. Who
cried, what is wrong? or is there any thing broke with you? No, no,
says Tom, but I am going home to make my bed, it has not been made
these two weeks, and now it is about the time the maid makes all
the rest, so I’ll go and make mine too. No, no, says his master,
go to your plough, and I’ll cause it to be made every night. Then,
says Tom, I’ll plough two or three furrows more in the time, so Tom
gained his end.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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