+--+---++------------------------+-------------------------------------+ |@ | @ || _Kalkulashuns._ | _RAMRODS._ | +--+---++------------------------+-------------------------------------+ | 1| M || @ Now pik geese @ | Revenge sumtimes sleeps, but | | 2| T || @ _awful_ | vanity alwus keeps _one I_ open. | | 3| W || _kold_ @ @ | | | 4| T || | | | 5| F || thou shalt not | * * * * * | | 6| S || commit | | | 7| G || swareing @ | Thare iz nothing in this world | | 8| M || @ @ _more sighns_ | that a man pays so hi a price for, | | 9| T || _ov kold_ | and gits so little ov hiz munny | |10| W || @ @ now bruize wood | back, as he duz for Repentance. | |11| T || @ _it iz kold_ @ | | |12| F || @ Jim | * * * * * | |13| S || Sheriden | | |14| G || born 1818 @ | I hav finally cum tew the | |15| M || _now expekt_ | konklushun, if a man kant be born | |16| T || _a thaw_ @ | but once, he had better issue | |17| W || @ Jim | proposals tew hav it dun sumwhare | |18| T || waz a | in Nu England. | |19| F || fiddler @ @ | | |20| S || @ _it duz thaw_ @ | | |21| G || @ thare are no | * * * * * | |22| M || fiddlers | | |23| T || in heaven @ | The only human being on the | |24| W || _thaw kontinues_ @ | face ov this earth that I really | |25| T || in kase ov | envy, iz a laffing Christian. | |26| F || doubt, lead | | |27| S || trumps @ | * * * * * | |28| G || @ _the thaw freezes_ | | |29| M || @ now | Men ov little authority are like | |30| T || mix | men ov little strength--alwus | |31| W || sassige @ @ @ | anxious tew lift sumthing. | +--+---++------------------------+-------------------------------------+ _HOROSKOPE FOR FEBUARY._ The man born this month will be good looking, but too mutch prone tew toe in when he walks. He will hav 2 wifes, and a small hand, except when he plays whist; then he will hav a big one. Hiz fust wife will be kross-eyed, but hiz seckond one will be kross all over. He will hav 4 children, who will all pass through the meazles, with grate credit tew themselfs and no disgrace tew the meazles.