Artists -- Fiction; Fathers and sons -- Fiction; Triangles (Interpersonal relations) -- Fiction
A stairway he climbed came out delightfully in a garret musical with
rain and the plaintive chirping of wet birds huddled under dripping
eaves. Unlike the rooms he had left below it was swept and clean.
There were trunks in one corner, a great many, and a cedar chest.
There should be a cedar chest. It was as essential to an old garret
like this as violets in spring or sweetness in a girl's face. The
chest was open. With a low whistle of delight Kenny peered inside and
thought of the ferryman in her quaint brocade. The chest was full to
the brim of old-time gowns, glints of faded satin and yellowed lace,
buckled slippers and old brocade.
"Mr. O'Neill!"
Kenny wheeled, his face scarlet with guilt and confusion. Joan was
beside him, her startled eyes dark with reproach. Even in his
stammering moment of apology he was dismayed to find that her gown was
commonplace, old and mended.
Joan caught his glance and colored.
"It's the dress I wear to Uncle," she said hurriedly. "I--I meant you
never to see it. He doesn't know. Everything there in the cedar chest
he hates. All of it belonged to my mother. He wouldn't like me to
wear her gowns."
"In the name of Heaven," demanded Kenny, shocked, "why not? It's a
beautiful thing--like the play-acting of a dryad!"
"My mother," said the girl in a low voice, "was on the stage."
Her challenging eyes, big and wistful, fanned his chivalry into
reckless flame. The need of the hour was peculiar. There was little
room for fact. In a moment of wayward impulse he had slipped up a
stairway and blundered on a shrine. He must not make another mistake.
The girl beside him was as timorous and defensive as a doe scenting an
alien breath in the wood of wild things. A wrong step and in spirit
she would bound away from him forever.
"Odd!" said Kenny gently. "So was mine." And he thought for a
tormented minute of Brian and Garry and John Whitaker. Not one of them
would understand. He wanted only to be kind and in tune.
Joan caught her breath. The softness and faith in her eyes hurt.
"You're not ashamed of it!"
"No," said Kenny, looking away, "Certainly not. Are you?"
"No," said Joan steadily. "But Uncle is."
In this second interval of readjustment, yesterday seemed aeons back.
They had traveled far. The peace and peril of the moment were
ineffably sweet.
"You can be yourself anywhere," said Joan clearly, taking from the
chest an exquisite old lavender gown for which she seemed to have come.
"And if your self is bad, the--the where doesn't matter."
Her insight rather startled him. Often afterward he was to find in her
that curious ability to detach herself from custom and tradition, skiff
away the husks of cumulative prejudice and find the kernel of truth for
herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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