Humorous stories; London (England) -- Fiction; Lucia (Fictitious character) -- Fiction; Women -- England -- Fiction
deigned to visit her discarded kingdom, she would find how busily and
successfully and originally they had got on without her, and that there
was no place for her on the committee, and probably none in the Museum
for the Elizabethan turnspit which so often made the chimney of her
music-room to smoke.
Riseholme, indeed, was busier than ever, for not only had it the Museum
feverishly to occupy it so that it might be open for the tourist season
this year, and, if possible, before Lucia came down for one of her
promised week-ends, but it was immersed in a wave of psychical
experiments. Daisy Quantock had been perfectly honest in acknowledging
that the idea of the Museum was not hers at all, but Abfou’s, her
Egyptian guide. She had, it is true, been as ingenious as Joseph in
interpreting Abfou’s directions, but it was Abfou to whom all credit was
due, and who evidently took such a deep interest in the affairs of
Riseholme. She even offered to present the Museum with the sheet of
foolscap on which the words “Riseholme Museum” (not “mouse”) were
written, but the general feeling of the committee, while thanking her
for her munificence, was that it would not be tactful to display it,
since the same Sibylline sheet contained those sarcastic remarks about
Lucia. It was proved also that Abfou had meant the Museum to be started,
for subsequently he several times said, “Much pleased with your plans
for the Museum. Abfou approves.” So everybody else wanted to get into
touch with Abfou too, and no less than four planchettes or ouija-boards
were immediately ordered by various members of Riseholme society. At
present Abfou did not manifest himself to any of them, except in what
was possibly Arabic script (for it certainly bore a strong resemblance
to his earlier efforts of communication with Daisy), and while she
encouraged the scribes to persevere in the hope that he might soon
regale them with English, she was not really very anxious that he
should. With her he was getting Englisher and Englisher every day, and
had not Simkinson, after having had the true meaning of the word “lazy”
carefully explained to him, consented to manage her garden again, it
certainly would have degenerated into primeval jungle, for she
absolutely had not a minute to attend to it.
Simkinson, however, was quite genial.
“Oh yes, ma’am, very pleased to come back,” he said. “I knew you
wouldn’t be able to get on long without me, and I want no explanations.
Now let’s have a look round and see what you’ve been doing. Why,
whatever’s happened to my mulberry tree?”
That was Simkinson’s way: he always talked of “my flowers” and “my
asparagus” when he meant hers.
“I’ve been pruning its roots,” she said.
“Well, ma’am, you’ve done your best to do it in,” said Simkinson. “I
don’t think it’s dead though, I daresay it’ll pull round.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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