_Spurrell._ Wait till I strike a light. (_After lighting a pair of candles._) Well, sir, if _you_ don't know why you're ramping about like that under a waste-paper basket, I can hardly be expected to---- _Undershell._ I was determined not to remove it until somebody came in; it fell on my head the moment I entered; it contained something in a soap-dish, which has wetted my face. You may laugh, sir, but if this is a sample of your aristocratic---- _Spurrell._ If you could only see yourself! But _I_'d nothing to do with it, 'pon my word I hadn't; only just this minute got away from the hall.... _I_ know! It's that sulky young beggar, Bearpark. I remember he slipped off on some excuse or other just now. He must have come in here and fixed that affair up for me--confound him! _Undershell._ I think _I_'m the person most entitled to---- But no matter; it is merely one insult more among so many. I came here, sir, for a purpose, as you are aware. _Spurrell_ (_ruefully_). Your dress clothes? All right, you shall have them directly. I wouldn't have put 'em on if I'd known they'd be wanted so soon. _Undershell._ I should have thought your own would have been more comfortable. _Spurrell._ More comfortable! I believe you. Why, I assure you I feel like a Bath bun in a baby's sock! But how was I to know? You shouldn't leave your things about like that! _Undershell._ It is usual, sir, for people to come to a place like this provided with evening clothes of their own. _Spurrell._ I know that as well as you do. Don't you suppose I'm unacquainted with the usages of society! Why, I've stayed in boarding-houses at the seaside many a time where it was _de rigger_ to dress--even for high tea! But coming down, as I did, on business, it never entered my head that I should want my dress suit. So, when I found them all as chummy and friendly as possible, and expecting me to dine as a matter of course,--why, I can tell you I was too jolly glad to get hold of anything in the shape of a swallowtail and white choker to be over particular! _Undershell._ You seem to have been more fortunate in your reception than I. But then _I_ had not the advantage of being here in a business capacity. _Spurrell._ Well, it wasn't that altogether. You see, I'm a kind of a celebrity in my way. _Undershell._ I should hardly have thought _that_ would be a recommendation here. _Spurrell._ I was surprised myself to find what a lot they thought of it; but, bless you, they're all as civil as shopwalkers; and, as for the ladies, why, the old Countess and Lady Maisie and Lady Rhoda couldn't be more complimentary if I'd won the Victoria Cross, instead of getting a first prize for breeding and exhibiting a bull-bitch at Cruft's Dog show!