"What difficulty?" She, however, knew well what would be the difficulty. "George Roden would be too near to us." "I should never see him unless you approved." "I should not approve. That would be the difficulty. He would argue the matter with me, and I should have to tell him that I could not let him come to the house, except with my father's leave. That would be out of the question. And therefore, as I say, there would be a difficulty." "I would never see him,--except with your sanction,--nor write to him,--nor receive letters from him. You are not to suppose that I would give him up. I shall never do that. I shall go on and wait. When a girl has once brought herself to tell a man that she loves him, according to my idea she cannot give him up. There are things which cannot be changed. I could have lived very well without thinking of him had I not encouraged myself to love him. But I have done that, and now he must be everything to me." "I am sorry that it should be so." "It is so. But if you will take me to Hendon I will never see him till I have papa's leave. It is my duty to obey him,--but not her." "I am not quite clear about that." "She has rejected me as a daughter, and therefore I reject her as a mother. She would get rid of us both if she could." "You should not attribute to her any such thoughts." "If you saw her as often as I do you would know. She hates you almost as much as me,--though she cannot show it so easily." "That she should hate my theories I can easily understand." "You stand in her way." "Of course I do. It is natural that a woman should wish to have the best for her own children. I have sometimes myself felt it to be a pity that Frederic should have an elder brother. Think what a gallant young Marquis he would make, while I am altogether out of my element." "That is nonsense, John." "I ought to have been a tailor. Tailors, I think, are generally the most ill-conditioned, sceptical, and patriotic of men. Had my natural propensities been sharpened by the difficulty of maintaining a wife and children upon seven and sixpence a day, I really think I could have done something to make myself conspicuous. As it is, I am neither one thing nor another; neither fish nor fowl nor good red herring. To the mind devoted to marquises I can understand that I should be a revolting being. I have no aptitudes for aristocratic prettinesses. Her ladyship has three sons, either of which would make a perfect marquis. How is it possible that she should not think that I am standing in her way?" "But she knew of your existence when she married papa." "No doubt she did;--but that does not alter her nature. I think I could find it in my heart to forgive her, even though she attempted to poison me, so much do I stand in her way. I have sometimes thought that I ought to repudiate myself; give up my prospects, and call myself John Trafford--so as to make way for her more lordly lordlings." "That is nonsense, John."