Catholics -- United States -- Fiction; Fathers and daughters -- Fiction; Nuns -- Fiction; West (U.S.) -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
"And as if I could help being grateful. It is so great a thing! For you
to wish that. There could be nothing greater. I can never forget it. You
must never think that I could forget it ... I--you know, Mr. Gore, that
I am not like most girls, being so very ignorant. I have never read a
novel. Even the nuns told me that some of them are beautiful and not bad
at all, but the contrary. Only, I have never read any. I know they are
full of this matter--love and marriage. They are great things, and
concern nearly all the men and women in the world, but not quite all. I
do not think I ever said to myself, 'They don't concern _you_.' I do not
think I ever thought about it, but if I had, I believe I should have
known that that matter would never concern me. Yet I do not want you to
misunderstand--Oh, if I could make you understand, please! I know that
it is a great thing, love and marriage, God's way for most men and
women. And I think it a wonderful, great thing that a man should wish
that for himself and me; should think that with me he could be happier
than in any other way. Of course, I never thought anyone would feel
that. It is a thing to thank you for, and always I shall thank you...."
"Is it impossible?"
She paused an infinitesimal moment and said:
"Just that. Impossible."
"Would it be fair to ask why 'impossible'?"
"Not unfair at all. But perhaps I cannot answer. I will try to answer.
When you told me what you wanted it pleased me because you wanted it,
and it hurt me because I (who had never thought about it before) knew at
once that it was not possible to do what you wanted, and I would so much
rather be able to please you."
"You will never be able to do anything else but please me. Your refusing
cannot change your being yourself."
Gore could not worry her with demands for reasons. He knew there was no
one else. He knew she was not incapable of loving--for he knew, better
than ever, that she loved greatly and deeply all whom she knew. Nay, he
knew that she loved _him_, among them, but more than any of them. And
yet he saw that she was simply right. What he had asked was "impossible,
just that." Better than himself she would love no one, and in the
fashion of a wife she would love no one, ever.
Yet, he asked her a question, not to harry her but because of her
father. "Perhaps you have resolved never to marry," he said.
"I never thought of it. But, as soon as I knew what you were saying, I
knew I should never marry anyone. It was not a resolution. It was just a
certainty. Alas! our resolutions are not certainties."
"But," Gore said gently, feeling it necessary to prepare her, "your
father may wish you to marry."
She paused, dubiously, and her brown skin reddened a little.
"You think so? Yes, he may," she answered in a troubled voice; for she
feared her father, more even than she was conscious of.
"I think he does," Gore said, not watching the poor girl's troubled
face.
"He wants me to marry you?" she inquired anxiously.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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