Men, Women, and God: A Discussion of Sex Questions from the Christian Point of ViewGray, A. Herbert (Arthur Herbert)
Religion
Men, Women, and God: A Discussion of Sex Questions from the Christian Point of View
Gray, A. Herbert (Arthur Herbert)
Sexual ethics -- Early 20th century
In the first place, for two healthy young persons to marry with the
definite intention of having no children is, I believe, an unchristian
thing. If they cannot afford to have children they cannot afford
to marry. If at the beginning they interfere with nature they spoil
their first experiences of sexual intimacy, which should be spontaneous
and untrammelled. I even believe that artificial attempts to postpone
the arrival of a first child are a deplorable mistake. The first
consummation of love should be closely followed by parentage. Some
couples having followed the plan of postponing parentage have, when it
was too late, found that by this course they had forfeited the
possibility of that great privilege. Of course children mean very hard
work. Of course they restrict the freedom of parents to pursue their
own pleasure, and use up a large proportion of the family income. But
these things are a blessing in disguise. Comparative poverty for young
couples is a bracing and a useful discipline. Probably the cream of the
nation consists of men and women reared in families of four or five,
where the parents gave much individual attention to each child, and by
self-denial helped them to a good start in life. When birth control is
resorted to in order to avoid the labors of family life it is a purely
selfish and quite indefensible thing.
I am thinking of course of healthy parents. Unhealthy parents probably
ought not to have children at all.
The second point I am clear about is that for most couples to have as
many children as is possible is equally indefensible. Most healthy
couples could have far more children than they can do justice to. In
fact the plan of unrestricted families results in a threefold wrong. It
is nothing less than cruel to women. The overburdened mothers who were
confined once a year or once in eighteen months, never allowed to
regain full strength between confinements, and made prematurely old,
are, I hope, a thing of the past. Marriage on those terms did mean
servitude. Further, the plan is cruel to children. They cannot
on these terms receive sufficient attention. They are not given a fair
start in life, and in many cases do not even receive sufficient healthy
nourishment. These things are of course in part due to the artificial
conditions of modern life. But the conditions are there and cannot be
ignored. And thirdly, the plan involves a wrong to society. We have
great need of healthy well-trained children, but society as a whole
suffers when children are brought into the world who cannot be properly
cared for.
About this point I conceive there really cannot be any doubt whatever.
And thus the problem of birth control forces itself upon our attention.
It is a duty to women, to children, and to the state. The really
difficult question is, "How is it to be achieved?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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