At this he seized her hand and covered it with kisses. She gently drew
him to his feet. He heard her say, "Forgive me, Paul; I did not know."
Her warm breath mingled with his, and she kissed him on the lips.
CHAPTER X.
In the days that followed, Ida was the object of a devotion on the part
of Miss Ludington and Paul which it would be inadequate to describe as
anything less than sheer idolatry. Her experience was such as a goddess's
might be who should descend from heaven and take up her abode in bodily
form among her worshippers, accepting in person the devotion previously
lavished on her effigy.
With Miss Ludington this devotion was the more intense as it was but a
sublimed form of selfishness, like that of the mother's to her child,
whom she feels to be a part, and the choicest part, of her own life. The
instinct of maternity, never gratified in her by the possession of
children, asserted itself toward this radiant girl, whose being was so
much closer to hers than even a child's could be, whose life was so
wonderfully her own and yet not her own, that, in loving her, self-love
became transfigured and adorable. She could not have told whether the
sense of their identity or their difference were the sweeter.
Her delight in the girl's loveliness was a transcendent blending of a
woman's pleasure in her own beauty and a lover's admiration of it. She
had transferred to Ida all sense of personal identity excepting just
enough to taste the joy of loving, admiring, and serving her.
To wait upon her was her greatest happiness. There was no service so
menial that she would not have been glad to perform it for her, and which
she did not grudge the servants the privilege of rendering. The happiness
which flooded her heart at this time was beyond description. It was not
such a happiness as enabled her to imagine what that of heaven might be,
but it was the happiness of heaven itself.
As might be expected, the semi-sacredness attaching to Ida, as a being
something more than earthly in the circumstances of her advent, lent a
rare strain to Paul's passion.
There is nothing sweeter to a lover than to feel that his mistress is of
a higher nature and a finer quality than himself. With many lovers, no
doubt, this feeling is but the delusion of a fond fancy, having no basis
in any real superiority on the part of the loved one. But the mystery
surrounding Ida would have tinged the devotion of the most prosaic lover
with an unusual sentiment of awe.
Paul compared himself with those fortunate youths of antiquity who were
beloved by the goddesses of Olympus, and in whose hearts religious
adoration and the passion of love blended in one emotion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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