"No, your vorship, she's no chicken, but she's desperate tender, though; and they'd kill and murder her, if she vasn't to keep herself quiet." "Is she very disconsolate under her bereavement?" "_Anan_, your vorship," said Solomon. "Does she grieve much?" "Oh! desperately, as your vorship may natt'rully suppose, when ve'd only come together three days." "Is she very handsome?" This was a question which seemed rather to bother the love-lorn Solomon. He simpered and sighed, and looked down and looked up, and nibbled the edge of his hat; and when the question had been repeated the third time, he replied, "I don't know 'xactly, your vorship--she's reckoned so. And I reckon--I reckon I vouldn't a married her if I didn't think so, your vorship!" After some further question and reply, in which he earnestly entreated that an officer might be sent with him to enforce his claim, and get the gentle Desdemona out of the garret by force of arms, the magistrate told him he could do nothing for him; whereupon he gathered up his features into a frown, put the lid upon his knowledge-box, and stalked out of the office, exclaiming, "Then by goles, I'll go to Marlborough-street! for I vont be diddled out of my vife in this ere manner, howsomever." A COACHMAN'S CONSCIENCE. A hackney coachman appeared before the Bench, upon a summons to answer the complaint of a gentleman from whom he had extorted _seven_ shillings and sixpence for a _four_ shilling fare! "How could you think of attempting such an impudent extortion!" asked the magistrate. "Why, your worship," replied honest _Coachee_, "I'll tell you how it was--I knows I'm guilty, but I'll tell you how it was, and I hopes you'll take it into your consideration, and not be too hard upon me. The gemman's sarvent what rode on the box wi' me, said to me, says he, as we were toddling a little ways down Oxford-street, your worship, says he to me, says he, 'Coachee,' says he, 'there's a _weddun_ (wedding) in _this_ job, so you needn't be afeard of laying it on pretty thick; and then, you know, you can tip me a _bob_ for my own cheek.'" "And pray what is a _bob_?" asked his worship. "Why a _shilling_, your honour, all the world over! When he ax'd me to stand a bob, your worship, I thought he was a rummish sort of a customer, but howsomever I took the hint; and when I set the gemman down I ax'd seven-and-sixpence, instead of a four shillings, God forgive me! But I thought I couldn't in conscience ax less?" "And pray," asked the magistrate, "did you give the servant the shilling you had promised him?" "No, your worship, I wouldn't give him anything; 'cause I thought he didn't desarve it, after putting me up to diddle his own master in that manner!"