Authors, English -- 20th century -- Biography; Waugh, Alec, 1898-1981
She swallowed her double at a gulp, then leant forward across the table.
“You don’t know who I am?” she said.
I shook my head.
“Then I’ll introduce myself. Miss Pussy Willow, late of the Vaudeville
Theatre!”
She was a good actress. She had always known how to get the most out of
her voice, how to lay the bait for an effect. And she got it all right.
I sat back and looked at her, looked at the puffed, swollen cheeks, the
pouches under the eyes, the unshapely mouth where the powder caked along
the wrinkles, the bulging double chin, and searched there, as one might
search in the face of a long drowned friend for some sign of accustomed
features, searched for that face, so pretty, so delicate, so appealing,
so utterly, so entrancingly soubrette, that had made so many hearts beat
quickly fifteen years ago. Not a trace of it. Not a trace of the woman
who had once been Pussy Willow, of the radiant creature who had swayed
in that great silver dress, before the chorus, singing the song that had
been for six months the rage of London: “Love is the song of a girl and
a boy.” Gone: all of it. That youth, that charm, that divine mingling of
simplicity and wantonness--buried beneath this coated unhealthy mask of
flesh and powder. I did not know what to say. She was looking at me in a
half-dazed, half-resentful manner, ready to hit back if what I might say
should hurt her. In the end I thought it better to say nothing.
“So it’s silence, is it?” she said. “Ah, well, I guessed as much. I know
what you’re thinking--the pity of it, that’s what you’re saying to
yourself. Poor Pussy Willow, you’ll say. Drunk herself down to this. And
then you’ll go back home and think what a damned fine fellow you are.
And to-morrow you’ll tell your friends up at the club: ‘Do you know whom
I saw yesterday?’ you’ll say. ‘Pussy Willow, quite drunk, she was. All
her looks gone. You wouldn’t have recognised her.’ And you’ll all raise
your hands and say: ‘The pity of it!’ and get self-righteous. And then
you’ll go back to your office and swindle some wretched underdog and
talk about leaving the world better than you found it. I know your sort.
You only come here to get warm with self-righteousness. Ah, you--But,
well, I’ll tell you this, mister: you talk about leaving the world
better than you found it, but I’ve probably done a sight more good in it
than you have.”
She paused on a high-pitched note of challenge.
But again I made no answer. I knew that I had only to wait to be told
the story. I caught the waiter’s eye, nodded, and another double was at
her elbow. She gulped it down quickly, as she had the other. She leant
forward, warmed, softened, recollective to continue on the note where
she had paused. “More good than you,--a blooming sight more good than
you. I saved a man once from becoming--well, you know what men become if
they don’t pull the reins up tight in the early thirties. Yes, me--I
saved a man. It makes me laugh now when I think of it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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