"Well, I'm going to get a hamper and pack it full of parcels and put a list of them on the top--beginning Turk-and-chains, and send it to Mister James Johnson, and when he opens the parcels there'll be nothing inside." "There must be something, you know," said H.O., "or the parcels won't be any shape except flatness." "Oh, there'll be _something_ right enough," was the bitter reply of the one who had not been to the Hippodrome, "but it won't be the sort of something he'll expect it to be. Let's do it now. I'll get a hamper." [Illustration: IT WAS RATHER DIFFICULT TO GET ANYTHING THE SHAPE OF A TURKEY.] He got a big one out of the cellar and four empty bottles with their straw cases. We filled the bottles with black ink and water, and red ink and water, and soapy water, and water plain. And we put them down on the list-- 1 bottle of port wine. 1 bottle of sherry wine. 1 bottle of sparkling champagne. 1 bottle of rum. The rest of the things we put on the list were-- 1 turkey-and-chains. 2 pounds of chains. 1 plum-pudding. 4 pounds of mince-pies. 2 pounds of almonds and raisins. 1 box of figs. 1 bottle of French plums. 1 large cake. And we made up parcels to look outside as if their inside was full of the delicious attributes described in the list. It was rather difficult to get anything the shape of a turkey but with coals and crushed newspapers and firewood we did it, and when it was done up with lots of string and the paper artfully squeezed tight to the firewood to look like the Turk's legs it really was almost lifelike in its deceivingness. The chains, or sausages, we did with dusters--and not clean ones--rolled tight, and the paper moulded gently to their forms. The plum-pudding was a newspaper ball. The mince-pies were newspapers too, and so were the almonds and raisins. The box of figs was a real fig-box with cinders and ashes in it damped to keep them from rattling about. The French-plum bottle was real too. It had newspaper soaked in ink in it, and the cake was half a muff-box of Dora's done up very carefully and put at the bottom of the hamper. Inside the muff-box we put a paper with-- "Revenge is not wrong when the other people begin. It was you began, and now you are jolly well served out." We packed all the bottles and parcels into the hamper, and put the list on the very top, pinned to the paper that covered the false breast of the imitation Turk. Dicky wanted to write--"From an unknown friend," but we did not think that was fair, considering how Dicky felt. So at last we put--"From one who does not wish to sign his name." And that was true, at any rate. Dicky and Oswald lugged the hamper down to the shop that has Carter Paterson's board outside.