Out of all patience with one's mistress and oneself, how furious the desire to bury oneself in indifference! The only good of such visits is to replenish the treasure of crystallisation. Life for Salviati was divided into periods of two weeks, which took their colour from the last evening he had been allowed to see Madame ----. For example, he was in the seventh heaven of delight the 21st of May, and the 2nd of June he kept away from home, for fear of yielding to the temptation of blowing out his brains. I saw that evening how badly novelists have drawn the moment of suicide. Salviati simply said to me: "I'm thirsty, I must take this glass of water." I did not oppose his resolution, but said good-bye: then he broke down. Seeing the obscurity which envelops the discourse of lovers, it would not be prudent to push too far conclusions drawn from an isolated detail of their conversation. [Pg 77] They give a fair glimpse of their feelings only in sudden expressions--then it is the cry of the heart. Otherwise it is from the complexion of the bulk of what is said that inductions are to be drawn. And we must remember that quite often a man, who is very moved, has no time to notice the emotion of the person who is the cause of his own. [1] The word was one of Léonore's. [Pg 78] CHAPTER XXV THE INTRODUCTION To see the subtlety and sureness of judgment with which women grasp certain details, I am lost in admiration: but a moment later, I see them praise a blockhead to the skies, let themselves be moved to tears by a piece of insipidity, or weigh gravely a fatuous affectation, as if it were a telling characteristic. I cannot conceive such simplicity. There must be some general law in all this, unknown to me. Attentive to one merit in a man and absorbed by one detail, women feel it deeply and have no eyes for the rest. All the nervous fluid is used up in the enjoyment of this quality: there is none left to see the others. I have seen the most remarkable men introduced to very clever women; it was always a particle of bias which decided the effect of the first inspection. If I may be allowed a familiar detail, I shall tell the story how charming Colonel L. B---- was to be introduced to Madame de Struve of Koenigsberg--she a most distinguished woman. "_Farà colpo?_"[1]--we asked each other; and a wager was made as a result. I go up to Madame de Struve, and tell her the Colonel wears his ties two days running--the second he turns them--she could notice on his tie the creases downwards. Nothing more palpably untrue! As I finish, the dear fellow is announced. The silliest little Parisian would have made more effect. Observe that Madame de Struve was one who could love. She is [Pg 79] also a respectable woman and there could have been no question of gallantry between them.