For years Martha had discharged her duties, if mechanically yet with a
sense of pleasure and serenity. At this moment she was as one pushed
unexpectedly to the brink of a precipice, over which the slightest
misstep would topple her. The world was out of joint. Shockingly bad
wishes flitted through her head. Each wish aimed at the disposal,
imaginary of course, of Warrington: by falling overboard, by being
seized with one of the numerous plagues, by having a deadly fracas with
one of those stealthy Lascars.
"I wish we had gone to Italy," she remarked finally.
"It would not have served my purpose in the least. I should have been
dancing and playing bridge and going to operas. I should have had no
time for thinking."
"Thinking!" Martha elevated her brows with an air that implied that
she greatly doubted this statement.
"Yes, thinking. It is not necessary that I should mope and shut myself
up in a cell, Martha, in order to think. I have finally come to the
end of my doubts, if that will gratify you. From now on you may rely
upon one thing, to a certainty."
Martha hesitated to put the question.
"I am not going to marry Arthur. He is charming, graceful,
accomplished; but I want a man. I should not be happy with him. I can
twist him too easily around my finger. I admit that he exercises over
me a certain indefinable fascination; but when he is out of sight it
amounts to the sum of all this doddering and doubting. It is probable
that I shall make an admirable old maid. Wisdom has its disadvantages.
I might be very happy with Arthur, were I not so wise." She smiled
again at the reflection in the mirror. "Now, let us go and astonish
the natives."
There was a mild flutter of eyelids as she sat down beside Warrington
and began to chatter to him in Italian. He made a brave show of
following her, but became hopelessly lost after a few minutes. Elsa
spoke fluently; twelve years had elapsed since his last visit to Italy.
He admitted his confusion, and thereafter it was only occasionally that
she brought the tongue into the conversation. This diversion, which
she employed mainly to annoy her neighbors, was, in truth, the very
worst thing she could have done. They no longer conjectured; they
assumed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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