Bildungsromans; Boys -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Middle West -- Fiction
Within five days from his first encounter with Rupe Collins, Penrod had
become unbearable. He even almost alienated Sam Williams, who for a time
submitted to finger twisting and neck squeezing and the new style of
conversation, but finally declared that Penrod made him “sick.” He made
the statement with fervour, one sultry afternoon, in Mr. Schofield's
stable, in the presence of Herman and Verman.
“You better look out, 'bo,” said Penrod, threateningly. “I'll show you a
little how we do up at the Third.”
“Up at the Third!” Sam repeated with scorn. “You haven't ever been up
there.”
“I haven't?” cried Penrod. “I HAVEN'T?”
“No, you haven't!”
“Looky here!” Penrod, darkly argumentative, prepared to perform the
eye-to-eye business. “When haven't I been up there?”
“You haven't NEVER been up there!” In spite of Penrod's closely
approaching nose Sam maintained his ground, and appealed for
confirmation. “Has he, Herman?”
“I don' reckon so,” said Herman, laughing.
“WHAT!” Penrod transferred his nose to the immediate vicinity of
Herman's nose. “You don't reckon so, 'bo, don't you? You better look out
how you reckon around here! YOU UNDERSTAN' THAT, 'BO?”
Herman bore the eye-to-eye very well; indeed, it seemed to please
him, for he continued to laugh while Verman chuckled delightedly. The
brothers had been in the country picking berries for a week, and it
happened that this was their first experience of the new manifestation
of Penrod.
“HAVEN'T I been up at the Third?” the sinister Penrod demanded.
“I don' reckon so. How come you ast ME?”
“Didn't you just hear me SAY I been up there?”
“Well,” said Herman mischievously, “hearin' ain't believin'!”
Penrod clutched him by the back of the neck, but Herman, laughing
loudly, ducked and released himself at once, retreating to the wall.
“You take that back!” Penrod shouted, striking out wildly.
“Don' git mad,” begged the small darky, while a number of blows falling
upon his warding arms failed to abate his amusement, and a sound one
upon the cheek only made him laugh the more unrestrainedly. He behaved
exactly as if Penrod were tickling him, and his brother, Verman, rolled
with joy in a wheelbarrow. Penrod pummelled till he was tired, and
produced no greater effect.
“There!” he panted, desisting finally. “NOW I reckon you know whether I
been up there or not!”
Herman rubbed his smitten cheek. “Pow!” he exclaimed. “Pow-ee! You
cert'ny did lan' me good one NAT time! Oo-ee! she HURT!”
“You'll get hurt worse'n that,” Penrod assured him, “if you stay around
here much. Rupe Collins is comin' this afternoon, he said. We're goin'
to make some policemen's billies out of the rake handle.”
“You go' spoil new rake you' pa bought?”
“What do WE care? I and Rupe got to have billies, haven't we?”
“How you make 'em?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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