"I see!" said Bordman with irony. He didn't. "I wish you all the
contentment you look for." Then he snapped: "But what's this business
about expecting more from me? What spectacular idea do you expect me to
pull out of somebody's hat now?--Because I'm frantically vain?"
"I haven't the least idea," said Aletha. "But I think you'll come up
with something we couldn't possibly imagine. And I didn't say it was
because you were vain, but because you are discontented with yourself.
It's born in you. And there you are!"
"If you mean neurotic," snapped Bordman, "you're all wrong. I'm not
neurotic. I'm hot, and I'm annoyed. I'll get hopelessly behind schedule
because of this mess. But that's all!"
Aletha stood up and shrugged her shoulders ruefully.
"I repeat my apology," she told him, "and leave you the office. But
I also repeat that I think you'll turn up something nobody else
expects--and I've no idea what it will be. But you'll do it now to
prove that I'm wrong about how your mind works."
She went out. Bordman clamped his jaws tightly. He felt that especially
haunting discomfort which comes of suspecting that one has been told
something about oneself which may be true.
"Idiotic!" he fumed, all alone. "Me neurotic? Me wanting to prove I'm
the best man here out of vanity?" He made a scornful noise. He sat
impatiently at the desk. "Absurd!" he muttered. "Why should I need to
prove to myself I'm capable? What would I do if I felt such a need,
anyhow?"
Scowling, he stared at the wall. It was a nagging sort of question.
What would he do if she were right? If he did need constantly to prove
to himself--
He stiffened, suddenly. A look of intense surprise came upon his face.
He'd thought of what a self-doubtful, discontented man would try to do,
here on Xosa II at this juncture.
The surprise was because he had also thought of how it could be done.
* * * * *
The _Warlock_ came to life. Her skipper gloomily answered
the emergency call from Xosa II. In a minute he clicked off the
communicator and hastened to an exterior port, deeply darkened against
those times when the blue-white sun Xosa shone upon this side of the
hull. He moved the manual control to make it more transparent, and
stared down at the monstrous, tawny, mottled surface of the planet five
thousand miles away. He searched for the spot he knew was the colony's
site.
He saw what he'd been told he'd see. It was an infinitely fine,
threadlike projection from the surface of the planet. It rose at a
slight angle--it leaned toward the planet's west--and it expanded and
widened and formed an extraordinary sort of mushroom-shaped object
that was completely impossible. It could not be. Humans do not create
visible objects twenty miles high, which at their tops expand like
toadstools on excessively slender stalks, and which drift westward,
fray, and grow thin, and are constantly renewed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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