Psmith in the CityWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Psmith in the City
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
'I'll go and try and get her round. How was I to know?'
Mr Richards thrust back his chair and bounded from the room.
'Now, iawinyaw, iear oiler--' said Comrade Prebble judicially, but was
interrupted.
'How very disturbing!' said Mr Waller. 'I am so sorry that this should
have happened. Ada is such a touchy, sensitive girl. She--'
'In Australia,' said Edward in even tones, 'they've _got_ Women's
Suffrage already. Did _you_ know that?' he said to Mike.
Mike made no answer. His eyes were fixed on his plate. A bead of
perspiration began to roll down his forehead. If his feelings could
have been ascertained at that moment, they would have been summed up in
the words, 'Death, where is thy sting?'
18. Psmith Makes a Discovery
'Women,' said Psmith, helping himself to trifle, and speaking with the
air of one launched upon his special subject, 'are, one must recollect,
like--like--er, well, in fact, just so. Passing on lightly from that
conclusion, let us turn for a moment to the Rights of Property, in
connection with which Comrade Prebble and yourself had so much that was
interesting to say this afternoon. Perhaps you'--he bowed in Comrade
Prebble's direction--'would resume, for the benefit of Comrade Jackson--a
novice in the Cause, but earnest--your very lucid--'
Comrade Prebble beamed, and took the floor. Mike began to realize that,
till now, he had never known what boredom meant. There had been moments
in his life which had been less interesting than other moments, but
nothing to touch this for agony. Comrade Prebble's address streamed on
like water rushing over a weir. Every now and then there was a word or
two which was recognizable, but this happened so rarely that it
amounted to little. Sometimes Mr Waller would interject a remark, but
not often. He seemed to be of the opinion that Comrade Prebble's was
the master mind and that to add anything to his views would be in the
nature of painting the lily and gilding the refined gold. Mike himself
said nothing. Psmith and Edward were equally silent. The former sat
like one in a trance, thinking his own thoughts, while Edward, who,
prospecting on the sideboard, had located a rich biscuit-mine, was too
occupied for speech.
After about twenty minutes, during which Mike's discomfort changed to a
dull resignation, Mr Waller suggested a move to the drawing-room, where
Ada, he said, would play some hymns.
The prospect did not dazzle Mike, but any change, he thought, must be
for the better. He had sat staring at the ruin of the blancmange so
long that it had begun to hypnotize him. Also, the move had the
excellent result of eliminating the snub-nosed Edward, who was sent to
bed. His last words were in the form of a question, addressed to Mike,
on the subject of the hypotenuse and the square upon the same.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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