MARRIAGE AND CHRISTENING EXTRAORDINARY. We beg to congratulate Lord John Russell on his approaching union with Lady Fanny Elliot. His lordship is such a persevering votary of Hymen, that we think he should be named “Union-Jack.” OMINOUS. LORD PALMERSTON, on his road to Windsor, narrowly escaped being upset by a gentleman in a gig. We have been privately informed that the party with whom he came in collision was—Sir Robert Peel. [pg 23] CROSS READINGS. (REC.) If you ever should be In a state of ennui, Just listen to me, And without any fee I’ll give you a hint how to set yourself free. Though dearth of intelligence weaken the news, And you feel an incipient attack of the blues, For amusement you never need be at a loss, If you take up the paper and read it across. (INTER ARIA DEMI LOQUI.) Here’s the Times, apropos, And so, With your patience, I’ll show What I mean, by perusing a passage or two. (ARIA.) “Hem! Mr. George Robins is anxious to tell, In very plain prose, he’s instructed to sell”— “A vote for the county”—“packed neatly in straw”— “Set by Holloway’s Ointment”—“a limb of the law.” “The army has had secret orders to seize”— “As soon as they can”—“the industrious fleas.” For amusement you never need be at a loss, If you take a newspaper and read it across. “The opera opens with”—“elegant coats”— “For silver and gold we exchange foreign notes”— “Specific to soften mortality’s ills”— “And cure Yorkshire bacon”—“take Morison’s pills.” “Curious coincidence”—“steam to Gravesend.” “Tale of deep interest”—“money to lend”— “Louisa is waiting for William to send.” For amusement you never need be at a loss, If you take a newspaper and read it across. “For relief of the Poles”—“an astounding feat!”— “A respectable man”—“for a water will eat”— “The Macadamised portion of Parliament-street.” “Mysterious occurrence!”—“expected incog.” “To be viewed by cards only”—“a terrible fog.” “At eight in the morning the steam carriage starts”— “Takes passengers now”—“to be finished in parts.” For amusement you never need be at a loss, If you take a newspaper and read it across. “Left in a cab, and”—“the number not known” “A famous prize ox, weighing 200 stone”— “He speaks with a lisp”—“has a delicate shape”— “And had on, when he quitted, a Macintosh cape.” “For China direct, a fine”—“dealer in slops.” “To the curious in shaving”—“new way to dress chops.” “Repeal of the corn”—“was roasted for lunch”— “Teetotal beverage “—“Triumph of PUNCH!” For amusement you never need be at a loss, If you take a newspaper and read it across. A CON. BY DUNCOMBE. “Why are four thousand eight hundred and forty yards of land obtained on credit like a drinking song?”—“Because it’s an-acre- on-tic.”—“I think I had you there!”