The truth was, her physical nature was awake and clamouring for
satisfaction, and the difficulty lay in the fact that having tasted the
caviare of the sophisticated passion of a Don Juan, she could not
content herself with the bread-and-butter of a calm, everyday affection.
Had she never been awakened, even if but partially, to the possibilities
of the latent passion within her, her life would have been calmer, less
eventful and happier--if happiness lie in the absence of upheaving
emotion. Requiring less of life she would have been more easily
satisfied, or would have imagined herself so. The narrow boundaries of
conventional contentment would have shut out the larger horizon of
emotional experience, pain and soul discipline. She would have remained
iron, Destiny was to make her steel tempered by fire.
She was writing in the living-room when her Aunt came in. The
comfortable room, with its low-raftered ceiling and large porcelain
stove looked very cheerful in the glow of the lamp. The heavy red
curtains were drawn across the windows, and the red table-cloth threw a
rosy reflection on the girl's face, as she leaned over her work. Her
hair was like live gold in the strong light of the hanging lamp.
Fru Boyesen came in and seated herself heavily in an upholstered
armchair. Ragna had raised her head on her Aunt's entrance but had not
interrupted her writing. Her Aunt scanned her closely; she had come to
look upon the girl as her own; she enjoyed her presence in the house,
and it was her proprietary feeling that was mortified by the girl's
failure to take advantage of the opportunities offered her. Astrid's
engagement, especially, rankled in the good woman's mind. Here was a
girl not as pretty, not as clever as Ragna, and several months younger,
whose mother had not the social influence and importance she herself
possessed, yet this girl was making an excellent match. It was too
vexatious!
Ragna looked up and meeting her Aunt's eyes, said:
"You have been out a long time, Auntie, did you enjoy yourself?"
"No," answered Fru Boyesen, "at least not very much. I don't see, Ragna,
why you can't go out and enjoy yourself like other young people instead
of moping here all by yourself and spoiling your looks with all your
studying. Now Astrid goes about and has a good time--she is out skating
with her friends now. Why can't you be more like her?"
"So you've been to Fru Bjork's," remarked Ragna quietly.
"I've been where I pleased," said Fru Boyesen, untying her
bonnet-strings and smoothing them between her plump fingers. "I don't
see what it has to do with you where I go. You shouldn't take me up so.
I think you are a very strange girl--and Fru Bjork can't understand you
any better than I do," she added.
"I do wish, Auntie, that you would not discuss me with Fru Bjork, or
anyone else."
"Hoighty, toighty, Miss! I shall discuss whom I please, and if you will
be so peculiar and different from other girls, you must expect people to
talk."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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