Sketches of the Fair Sex, in All Parts of the World.: To which are added rules for determining the precise figure, the degree of beauty, the habits, and the age of women, notwithstanding the aids and disguise of dress.Anonymous
History
Sketches of the Fair Sex, in All Parts of the World.: To which are added rules for determining the precise figure, the degree of beauty, the habits, and the age of women, notwithstanding the aids and disguise of dress.
Anonymous
Women
"_Sale of a wife at Carlisle_--The inhabitants of this city lately
witnessed the sale of a wife by her husband, Joseph Thompson, who
resides in a small village about three miles distant, and rents a farm
of about forty-two or forty-four acres. She was a spruce, lively, buxom
damsel, apparently not exceeding twenty-two years of age, and appeared
to feel a pleasure at the exchange she was about to make. They had no
children during their union, and that, with some family disputes, caused
them by mutual agreement to come to the resolution of finally parting.
Accordingly, the bellman was sent round to give public notice of the
sale, which was to take place at twelve o'clock; and this announcement
attracted the notice of thousands. She appeared above the crowd,
standing on a large oak chair, surrounded by many of her friends, with a
rope or halter, made of straw, round her neck, being dressed in rather a
fashionable country style, and appearing to some advantage. The husband,
who was also standing in an elevated position near her, proceeded to put
her up for sale, and spoke nearly as follows:--'Gentlemen, I have to
offer to your notice my wife, Mary Anne Thompson, otherwise Williamson,
whom I mean to sell to the highest and fairest bidder. It is her wish as
well as mine to part for ever. I took her for my comfort, and the good
of my house, but she has become my tormentor and a domestic curse, &c.
&c. Now I have shown you her faults and failings, I will explain her
qualifications and goodness. She can read fashionable novels and milk
cows; she can laugh and weep with the same ease that you can take a
glass of ale; she can make butter, and scold the maid; she can sing
Moore's melodies, and plait her frills and caps; she cannot make rum,
gin, or whiskey, but she is a good judge of their quality from long
experience in tasting them, I therefore offer her, with all her
perfections and imperfections, for the sum of fifty shillings.'--After
an hour or two, she was purchased by Henry Mears, a pensioner, for the
sum of twenty shillings and a Newfoundland dog. The happy pair
immediately left town together, amidst the shouts and huzzas of the
multitude, in which they were joined by Thompson, who, with the greatest
good-humor imaginable, proceeded to put the halter, which his wife had
taken off, round the neck of his Newfoundland dog, and then proceeded
to the first public house, where he spent the remainder of the day."
PUNISHMENT OF ADULTERY.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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