'Well, Tom, he thinks things is comin' tiv a pretty pass if his missis is gannin' ti clean her boots on him efter a week's marryin'; so, much against his will, he pulls hissel' tegither, an' by the help o' the bedpost gets on his feet. '"Wey," cries Lizzie again, lookin' him ower mair scornfu' than ever, "thoo's as unsteady on thy feet as a horse wi' the staggers!" she says. "I could knock thoo doon wi' one finger!" '"I bet-sh a sovereign thoo cannet; ay, an' anither that I'll drive yo'r lugs reet intiv yo'r heid wi' one bat o' my fist," says he; an' he puffs hissel' oot as he searches for the coin, an' spits on his hands iv a preliminary sort o' way. 'Then, sudden, she comes up tiv him, gies him a tap wiv her forefinger, unexpected like, straight on the breast, an' Tom, taken unawares, lurches backward, catches his foot iv a bracket, crashes intiv a chair, an' falls wiv a tarr'ble thump an' a racket of furniture straight on ti the flaggin'. He gies a little lift ov his head as he looks up in a dazed way for a moment from the floor. Then he says, sinkin' back again, "There's been a fall o' stone; gan an' fetch the depity," he says, then sort o' dwams (swoons) awa. 'Lizzie, she looks him ower for awhile, cool as a policeman wiv a lantern, then lifts a pillow off the bed, an' puts it under his head as he lies stretched upon the floor. Next, she takes the boots off her man, an' sae leaves him ti bide where he lies, whilst she gans ti bed her lane. 'Next mornin' Tom feels hissel' as sick as a bad bat o' the head an' a wambly stomach can make a man, an' "lies in" while his missus gies him warm things ti drink, an' tends him like a bairn. 'Well, she has him properly caught, for he has ti lie there idle the best part ov a week, an' cannet work for another week efter that, the skelp he'd got frae the fall bein' a serious affair, as it seemed. 'When he gets up again he was sae savage at the chaff he gets aboot bein' knocked doon biv his missus that he gans back tiv his hoos iv a hurry, tak's off his belt, an' is gannin' ti strap her within an inch ov her life, when she says, "Tom, an' who was it that's been nursin' thoo this last fortnight?" An' she axes it quietly, facin' him wivoot a tremor, her eyes fixed upon his. 'Tom stands there wiv his arm uplifted; but though he was hot ti strike her, somehoo or ither, as he said efter, he was fair bested if he could manage it.