Tales of St. Austin'sWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Tales of St. Austin's
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories; Schools -- Fiction
When once he was fairly started on any business, physical or mental,
Charteris generally shaped well. It was the starting that he found the
difficulty. Now that he was actually in motion, he was enjoying himself
thoroughly. He wondered why on earth he had been so reluctant to come
for this run. The knowledge that there were three miles to go, and that
he was equal to them, made him feel a new man. He felt fit. And there
is nothing like feeling fit for dispelling boredom. He swung along with
the Babe at a steady pace.
'There's the cottage,' he said, as they turned a bend of the road, and
Worbury appeared a couple of hundred yards away. 'Let's sprint.' They
sprinted, and arrived at the door of the cottage with scarcely a yard
between them, much to the admiration of the Oldest Inhabitant, who was
smoking a thoughtful pipe in his front garden. Mrs Oldest Inhabitant
came out of the cottage at the sound of voices, and Charteris broached
the subject of tea. The menu was sumptuous and varied, and even the
Babe, in spite of his devotion to strict training, could scarce forbear
to smile happily at the mention of hot cakes.
During the _mauvais quart d'heure_ before the meal, Charteris kept
up an animated conversation with the Oldest Inhabitant, the Babe
joining in from time to time when he could think of anything to say.
Charteris appeared to be quite a friend of the family. He enquired
after the Oldest Inhabitant's rheumatics. It was gratifying to find
that they were distinctly better. How had Mrs O. I. been since his last
visit? Prarper hearty? Excellent. How was the O. I.'s nevvy?
At the mention of his nevvy the O. I. became discursive. He told his
audience everything that had happened in connection with the said nevvy
for years back. After which he started to describe what he would
probably do in the future. Amongst other things, there were going to be
some sports at Rutton today week, and his nevvy was going to try and
win the cup for what the Oldest Inhabitant vaguely described as 'a
race'. He had won it last year. Yes, prarper good runner, his nevvy.
Where was Rutton? the Babe wanted to know. About eight miles out of
Stapleton, said Charteris, who was well up in local geography. You got
there by train. It was the next station.
Mrs O. I. came out to say that tea was ready, and, being drawn into the
conversation on the subject of the Rutton sports, produced a programme
of the same, which her nevvy had sent them. From this it seemed that
the nevvy's 'spot' event was the egg and spoon race. An asterisk
against his name pointed him out as the last year's winner.
'Hullo,' said Charteris, 'I see there's a strangers' mile. I'm a demon
at the mile when I'm roused. I think I shall go in for it.'
He handed the programme back and began his tea.
'You know, Babe,' he said, as they were going back that evening, 'I
really think I shall go in for that race. It would be a most awful rag.
It's the day before the House-match, so it'll just get me fit.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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