The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 76, February, 1864: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and PoliticsVarious
General
The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 76, February, 1864: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and Politics
Various
American periodicals
Many another endeavor did George Hammond make to bring his sister and
myself together, but the first impression had been too strong for me,
and Miss Hammond made no effort to remove it. I do not believe it ever
crossed her mind to try to do so. Little was it to her whether or no she
made herself pleasant to a stupid, ugly girl. She had her books, her
light household cares, her letter-writing, her gardening, her walks and
drives with her brother, and she felt and showed little interest in
anything else. Very unpopular she was among the people around her, who
contrasted her cold reserve with her brother's frank cordiality; but she
troubled herself not at all about her unpopularity. For me, I kept shyly
out of her way, and fell back into my old habits.
I had not lost my friend, Mr. Hammond. He did not read with me regularly
as before, but he kept me supplied with books, and the very infrequency
of his lessons stimulated me to redoubled effort, that I might surprise
him by my progress when we met again. Then there was scarcely a day that
some business did not take him past our house, or that I did not meet
him by the river-bank or at the store. Sometimes he would ask me to row
him down the stream on some errand, sometimes he would take me with him
in his rides. I was a fearless horsewoman, and Miss Hammond did not
ride. In all those meetings he was frank and kind as ever; he told me of
his plans, his annoyances, his projects. No, I had not lost my friend,
as I had feared, and when assured of this, I could do without Miss
Hammond.
And so the weeks glided into months, and the months into years, and I
was nineteen years old. Four years had passed since the morning when
George Hammond first awakened my self-esteem, first gave me the impulse
to raise myself out of my awkwardness and ignorance, to make of myself
something better than one of the worn, depressed, dispirited women I saw
around me. Had I done anything for myself? I asked. I was not educated,
I had no acquirements, so-called; but I had read, and read well, some
good and famous books, and I knew that I had made their contents my own.
I was richer for their beauties and excellences. With my self-respect
had come, too, a desire to improve my surroundings, and, as far as they
lay under my control, they had been improved. Our household was more
orderly; some little attempt at neatness and decoration was to be seen
around and in the house, and my own room, where I had full sway, was
beautiful in its rustic adornment.
My glass, too, the poor little three-cornered, paper-framed companion of
my girlhood, showed me some change. The complexion had cleared, the hair
had taken a decided brown, and the angular figure had rounded and
filled. It was hardly a week since, standing in Miss Hammond's kitchen
counting over with her servant-girl the basketful of fresh eggs which
were sent from our house every week, I had overheard Mr. Hammond say to
his sister,--
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