The Autobiography of Mark Rutherford, Edited by his friend Reuben ShapcottWhite, William Hale
General
The Autobiography of Mark Rutherford, Edited by his friend Reuben Shapcott
White, William Hale
Religious fiction
During his sickness I was much impressed by Mary’s manner of nursing him.
She was always entirely wrapped up in her father, so much so, that I had
often doubted if she could survive him; but she never revealed any trace
of agitation. Under the pressure of the calamity which had befallen her,
she showed rather increased steadiness, and even a cheerfulness which
surprised me. Nothing went wrong in the house. Everything was perfectly
ordered, perfectly quiet, and she rose to a height of which I had never
suspected her capable, while her father’s stronger nature was allowed to
predominate. She was absolutely dependent on him. If he did not get
well she would be penniless, and I could not help thinking that with the
like chance before me, to say nothing of my love for him and anxiety lest
he should die, I should be distracted, and lose my head; more especially
if I had to sit by his bed, and spend sleepless nights such as fell to
her lot. But she belonged to that class of natures which, although
delicate and fragile, rejoice in difficulty. Her grief for her father
was exquisite, but it was controlled by a sense of her responsibility.
The greater the peril, the more complete was her self-command.
To the surprise of everybody Mardon got better. His temperate habits
befriended him in a manner which amazed his more indulgent neighbours,
who were accustomed to hot suppers, and whisky-and-water after them.
Meanwhile I fell into greater difficulties than ever in my ministry. I
wonder now that I was not stopped earlier. I was entirely unorthodox,
through mere powerlessness to believe, and the catalogue of the articles
of faith to which I might be said really to subscribe was very brief. I
could no longer preach any of the dogmas which had always been preached
in the chapel, and I strove to avoid a direct conflict by taking
Scripture characters, amplifying them from the hints in the Bible, and
neglecting what was supernatural. That I was allowed to go on for so
long was mainly due to the isolation of the town and the ignorance of my
hearers. Mardon and his daughter came frequently to hear me, and this, I
believe, finally roused suspicion more than any doctrine expounded from
the pulpit. One Saturday morning there appeared the following letter in
the _Sentinel_:
“SIR,—Last Sunday evening I happened to stray into a chapel not a
hundred miles from Water Lane. Sir, it was a lovely evening, and
‘The glorious stars on high,
Set like jewels in the sky,’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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