The Clean HeartHutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
Science
The Clean Heart
Hutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
Authors -- Fiction; Happiness -- Fiction
As Mr. Wriford watched, himself breathing immensely after his own
exertions yet laughing excitedly at what he saw, he was given
opportunity of taking part by the rollers introducing a new diversion
into their exercise. This was provided by the grandfather clock,
which, embedded in the debris like a partly submerged coffin, now
obstructed their progress. A common spirit of splendid determination
not to be stopped by it appeared simultaneously to animate them.
With one very loud _Ur!_ they came against it; with a secondhand a
third and each time a louder _Ur!_ charged it again and again; with a
fourth _Ur!_ magnificently mounted it; and with a fifth, the debris
on this side being lower, plunged down from it. The shock in some
degree relaxed their embrace one with the other. From their locked
forms a pair of naked legs upshot. Mr. Wriford jumped for the
ankles, clutched them amain, and with the information "I've got his
legs!" and with its effect, encouraged Mr. Puddlebox to a mighty
effort, whereby at length he broke free from the other's grasp, sat
upright upon the nightshirt's chest, and then, securing its arms,
faced about towards Mr. Wriford, and seated himself upon the
nightshirt's forehead.
"Where's yours?" said Mr. Puddlebox, when he had collected sufficient
breath for the question.
"Locked up in there," said Mr. Wriford, nodding his head towards the
dairy.
"Loony," said Mr. Puddlebox, "this has been the most devil of a thing
that ever any man has been in, and I challenge you or any man ever to
have been in a worse."
"I'll have you in a worse," bawled the nightshirt. "I'll--" and as
though incapable of giving sufficient words to his intentions he
opened his mouth very widely and emitted from it a long and roaring
bellow. Into this cavern of his jaws Mr. Puddlebox, now kneeling on
the nightshirt's arms, dropped a cloth cap very conveniently
abandoned by the corduroy; and then, facing across the prostrate
form, Mr. Puddlebox and Mr. Wriford went into a hysteria of laughter
only checked at last by the nightshirt, successfully advantaging
himself of the weakening effect of their mirth, making a tremendous
struggle to overthrow them.
"But, loony," said Mr. Puddlebox when the farmer was again mastered,
"we are best out of this, for such a battle I could by no means fight
again."
"Well, I don't care," said Mr. Wriford. "I don't care a dash what
happens or who comes. Still, we'd better go. First we must tie this
chap up and then clean ourselves. My man's all right in there.
There's no window where he is--only a grating round the top. I'll
find something to fix this one with if you can hold his legs."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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