I am fully sensible, O my God, that there cannot be a greater misfortune than to have displeased thee, who art infinitely good and worthy of all our affections. I tremble when I consider how terrible a misfortune it is to fall unprepared into thy hands; for who can bear that dreadful sentence: _Depart from me, ye accursed, into eternal fire!_--Matthew xxv. But the thought of losing thee, O Lord, alarms me still more than any other punishment whatsoever. Thy patience in waiting for me, thy readiness to pardon me, the multitude of thy mercies, which I have so often experienced, are now present to my mind; they upbraid me most forcibly. {93} Thou hast brought me forth from nothing, created me to thine own image and likeness, ransomed me with thy precious blood, and after I had rebelled and become a slave to Satan, thou didst still bear with me, adopt me as thy child, and prefer me to thousands who were never enlightened by thy holy law. Yet I have deserted thee, I have tired myself in the ways of iniquity, I have hated thy discipline, I have turned my back on all thy commandments. Though thou hast called me, yet have I refused to return; though thou hast frequently stretched out thy hands to me, yet I have paid no regard to thy invitations. Wretch that I am! who shall deliver me from this body of death? Who shall give water to my head, and a fountain of tears to my eyes, that day and night I may weep for my ingratitude? I have sinned! what shall I do to appease thee? O Guardian of men! behold I acknowledge my iniquity. My transgressions are become a heavy burden upon me. I am not worthy to appear before thee, nor even to lift up my eyes before thy throne. From the depth of my misery I cry out to thee: O Lord, hear my voice, and be merciful to a poor sinner! Thy mercies surpass all thy works; thou willest not my death but my conversion; nor didst thou come to call the just, but sinners to repentance. Thou art always mindful of thy word, on which I rely: receive thy prodigal child, nor let me henceforth be ever separated from thee. {94}