"Alone," he said in an undertone. The sky was blue now--cloudless
blue; but in that word alone he could hear the rumble of storms below
the horizon, storms past, storms to come.
"The real helpers," she went on, "are those who strengthen us day by
day, hour by hour. And when no physical presence would do any good,
when no outside aid is possible--they--it's like finding a wall at
one's back when one's in dread of being surrounded. I suppose you
don't realize how much it means to--to how many people--to watch a man
who goes straight and strong on his way--without blustering, without
trampling anybody, without taking any mean advantage. You don't mind
my saying these things?"
She felt the look which she did not venture to face as he answered: "I
needed to hear them to-day. For it seemed to me that I, too, had got
to the limit of my strength."
"But you hadn't." She said this confidently.
"No--I suppose not. I've thought so before; but somehow I've always
managed to gather myself together. This time it was the work of years
apparently undone--hopelessly undone. They"--she understood that
"they" meant the leaders of the two corrupt rings whose rule of the
state his power with the people menaced--"they have bought away some of
my best men--bought them with those 'favors' that are so much more
disreputable than money because they're respectable. Then they came to
me"--he laughed unpleasantly--"and took me up into a high mountain and
showed me all the kingdoms of the earth, as it were. I could be
governor, senator, they said, could probably have the nomination for
president even,--not if I would fall down and worship them, but if I
would let them alone. I could accomplish nearly all that I've worked
so long to accomplish if I would only concede a few things to them. I
could be almost free. ALMOST--that is, not free at all."
She said: "And they knew you no better than that!"
"Now," he continued, "it looks as if I'll have to build all over again."
"I think not," she replied. "If they weren't still afraid of you
they'd never have come to you. But what does it matter? YOU don't
fight for victory, you fight for the fight's sake. And so"--she looked
at him proudly--"you can't lose."
"Thank you. Thank you," he said in a low voice.
She sighed. "How I envy you! You LIVE. I can simply be alive.
Sometimes I feel as if I were sitting in a railway station waiting to
begin my journey--waiting for a train that's late--nobody knows how
late. Simply alive--that's all."
"That's a great deal," he said. He was looking round at the sky, at
the horizon, at the fields far and near, at her. "A great deal," he
repeated.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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