“When I left America a little later, I felt as if I were the golden fleece starting off in search of a conqueror. I may sometimes have been foolish ... I may sometimes have made mistakes--perhaps I am making one now in talking to you like this--but you, on your side, don’t imagine that because I have given myself to you, you have won me. Make certain of this--I abominate mediocrity and I can love no one who isn’t a conqueror. If you want me, it must be to help you to victory; if it’s only to be pitied and consoled and made much of ... no, my dear boy--I’d better say so at once--_I’m_ not the person you need--it’s Laura.” She said all this without turning round and while she was continuing to arrange her rebellious locks, but Vincent caught her eye in the glass. “May I give you my answer this evening?” he said, getting up and taking off his oriental garments to get into his day clothes. “I must go home quickly now so as to catch my brother Olivier before he goes out. I’ve got something to say to him.” He said it by way of apology, to give colour to his departure; but when he went up to Lilian, she turned round to him smiling, and so lovely that he hesitated. “Unless I leave a line for him to get at lunch time,” he added. “Do you see a great deal of him?” “Hardly anything. No, it’s an invitation for this afternoon, which I’ve got to pass on to him.” “From Robert?... _Oh! I see!_[2]...” she said, smiling oddly. “That’s a person, too, I must talk to you about.... All right! Go at once. But come back at six o’clock, because at seven his car is coming to take us out to dinner in the Bois.” Vincent walks home, meditating as he goes; he realizes that from the satisfaction of desire there may arise, accompanying joy and as it were sheltering behind it, something not unlike despair. FOOTNOTES: [Footnote 2: In English in the original.] VIII EDOUARD AND LAURA _Il faut choisir d’aimer les femmes ou de les connaître; il n’y a pas de milieu._ CHAMFORT.