The Death of the Gods: (Christ and Antichrist, 1 of 3)Merezhkovsky, Dmitry Sergeyevich
History
The Death of the Gods: (Christ and Antichrist, 1 of 3)
Merezhkovsky, Dmitry Sergeyevich
Biographical fiction; Julian, Emperor of Rome, 331-363 -- Fiction; Rome -- History -- Julian, 361-363 -- Fiction
When Julian awoke and raised his prostrate face he saw one of the
initiating priests lighting a lamp. He felt giddy, but remembered
exactly everything that had taken place. His eyes were blindfolded
and, strengthened with spiced wine, he was enabled to climb the
staircase, his hand gripped this time by the strong hand of Maximus.
He felt as if an invisible force was lifting him on wings. The teacher
of rites said to the lad--
"Now ask what you will!"
"Did you summon Him?" inquired Julian.
"No. But when one chord of the lyre vibrates, another chord responds.
Opposite answers opposite."
"Why is there such potency in His words if His words are only lies?"
"His words are truth."
"What do you mean? Then it is the Titan and the Angel who lied?"
"They also are the truth."
"Do you mean that there are two truths?"
"Two truths."
"Ah! You are tempting me!..."
"Not I, but the wholeness of the truth. If you are afraid, be silent."
"I am afraid of nothing. Say on; tell all! Are the Galileans right?"
"Yes."
"Why then should I have renounced them?"
"There is, beside theirs, another truth."
"One higher?"
"No, equal."
"But in what is one to believe? Where is the God whom I seek?"
"Both here and yonder. Serve Ahriman,--serve Ormuzd, whichever
pleases you! But forget not that both are equal,--the kingdom of
Lucifer and the kingdom of God."
"Which way should I choose?"
"Choose one of the two roads, and halt no more!"
"But which?"
"If you believe in Him, take up the cross. Follow Him according to His
command; be humble, chaste. Be the lamb that was dumb between the
hands of the shearers. Flee into the desert for salvation; give Him
body, soul, and reason! Believe!... that is one way. And the Galilean
martyrs attain the same liberty that Prometheus and Lucifer have
attained."
"That way I cannot choose."
"Choose then the other path. Be puissant as your ancestors of old, the
heroes--proud, pitiless, and haughty. No compassion! No love! No
pardon! Arise and conquer all things! Let your body become hard as
marble out of which the demigods are hewn! Take and give not! Taste of
the forbidden fruit and repent not! Believe not, doubt not, and the
world shall be thine! Thou shalt be the Titan--an angel revolted
against God."
"But I can never forget that the words of the Galilean contain truth
also. I cannot admit two beliefs."
"Then thou shalt be like all common mortals and hadst better never
been born; but thou canst choose. Make the venture!... Thou shalt be
emperor!"
"I? Emperor?"
"Thou shalt have between thy hands what Alexander never had."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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