A MEGARIAN. Hail! market of Athens, beloved of Megarians. Let Zeus, the patron of friendship, witness, I regretted you as a mother mourns her son. Come, poor little daughters of an unfortunate father, try to find something to eat; listen to me with the full heed of an empty belly. Which would you prefer? To be sold or to cry with hunger. DAUGHTERS. To be sold, to be sold! MEGARIAN. That is my opinion too. But who would make so sorry a deal as to buy you? Ah! I recall me a Megarian trick; I am going to disguise you as little porkers, that I am offering for sale. Fit your hands with these hoofs and take care to appear the issue of a sow of good breed, for, if I am forced to take you back to the house, by Hermes! you will suffer cruelly of hunger! Then fix on these snouts and cram yourselves into this sack. Forget not to grunt and to say wee-wee like the little pigs that are sacrificed in the Mysteries. I must summon Dicaeopolis. Where is he? Dicaeopolis, will you buy some nice little porkers? DICAEOPOLIS. Who are you? a Megarian? MEGARIAN. I have come to your market. DICAEOPOLIS. Well, how are things at Megara?[232] MEGARIAN. We are crying with hunger at our firesides. DICAEOPOLIS. The fireside is jolly enough with a piper. But what else is doing at Megara, eh? MEGARIAN. What else? When I left for the market, the authorities were taking steps to let us die in the quickest manner. DICAEOPOLIS. That is the best way to get you out of all your troubles. MEGARIAN. True. DICAEOPOLIS. What other news of Megara? What is wheat selling at? MEGARIAN. With us it is valued as highly as the very gods in heaven! DICAEOPOLIS. Is it salt that you are bringing? MEGARIAN. Are you not holding back the salt? DICAEOPOLIS. 'Tis garlic then? MEGARIAN. What! garlic! do you not at every raid grub up the ground with your pikes to pull out every single head? DICAEOPOLIS. What _do_ you bring then? MEGARIAN. Little sows, like those they immolate at the Mysteries. DICAEOPOLIS. Ah! very well, show me them. MEGARIAN. They are very fine; feel their weight. See! how fat and fine. DICAEOPOLIS. But what is this? MEGARIAN. A _sow_, for a certainty.[233] DICAEOPOLIS. You say a sow! of what country, then? MEGARIAN. From Megara. What! is that not a sow then? DICAEOPOLIS. No, I don't believe it is. MEGARIAN. This is too much! what an incredulous man! He says 'tis not a sow; but we will stake, an you will, a measure of salt ground up with thyme, that in good Greek this is called a sow and nothing else. DICAEOPOLIS. But a sow of the human kind. MEGARIAN. Without question, by Diocles! of my own breed! Well! What think you? will you hear them squeal? DICAEOPOLIS. Well, yes, i' faith, I will. MEGARIAN. Cry quickly, wee sowlet; squeak up, hussy, or by Hermes! I take you back to the house. GIRL. Wee-wee, wee-wee! MEGARIAN. Is that a little sow, or not? DICAEOPOLIS. Yes, it seems so; but let it grow up, and it will be a fine fat cunt.