The Gay Gnani of Gingalee; or, Discords of Devolution: A Tragical Entanglement of Modern Mysticism and Modern ScienceHuntley, Florence
Religion
The Gay Gnani of Gingalee; or, Discords of Devolution: A Tragical Entanglement of Modern Mysticism and Modern Science
Huntley, Florence
Mysticism -- Humor; Religion and science -- Fiction
“Notice, please,” said Bill, “that I am able at will to increase or
decrease this current which prevents your escape from the sphere of
attraction. You will see that I am thus able nicely to regulate your
speed from the slow and comfortable to the dizzy and dangerous.”
“Dangerous? Dangerous, did you say? I hardly understand you”--faltered
the Mystic, paling as he spoke.
“Let me illustrate,”--and the hand of the avenger sought the lever.
The little monster whirled fiercely, increasing with each revolution
both the speed and the terror of its victim. Faster and faster whirled
the cylinder. Faster and faster flew the lately fascinating Seer.
“Hold,--hold,--I--I--I--must ask--one--question,” shrilled brokenly
upon the sparkling air.
“Certainly,” responded Bill, lessening the current as he spoke.
“I say, Bill--upon what prin--principle do--you--op--operate?” gasped
the suddenly released gentleman. “I must know if it agrees with--with
our sch--ool.”
The man at the machine bowed graciously, and jauntily saluted his old
chum. Bill was flattered. To be thus interrogated by one whose
profession was wisdom, was a distinct compliment. He straightened
himself and lifted his chin.
“Helium,”--he said, in a loud, cheerful voice,--“that of which you are
composed, I discover to be nothing more than a dephlogisticated
condition of matter. Now this highly attenuated substance is (as you
may, but probably do not know) highly susceptible to electrical
forces. I further discover that by virtue of electro-dynamics we are
able to convert this highly refined substance into hydrogen, a highly
volatile metal. This, under increased pressure, is finally raised to
the point of ignition. D’ye hear, my gay Gnani? For here’s where I get
in my fine work. Let me repeat,--this highly volatile hydrogen is, or
will presently be--raised to the point of ignition--Phlogiston is
Restored and--_pish_--_you_ go.”
“Horrible! horrible! but true, alas, too true,”--and the Mystic and
his Mate bowed their heads in unison.
“And, hear me still further, Mr. Psycho-Bunko-Hiero-Phanto,” continued
Mr. Vanderhook remorselessly. “I’d have you know that the curriculum
of your musty old schools in Hindustan never counted on a tussle with
physical science. They go no further than the application of certain
metaphysical forces to nonresistant physical substance, or noncompos
gray matter of certain fool people I know. They never equip their
alleged pupils to meet nor to resist an active and rational campaign
on the lower planes. With all your tricks you Oriental fakirs aren’t
in it with an Edison plant. You’re not in it with the twentieth
century scientist, when he has a real ax to grind,”--and by way of
illustration Bill increased the current and ground his teeth.
Moved by his enemy’s science, rather than by his satire, Alonzo
Leffingwell passed on his way--lamenting.
But he returned again, and hung suspended at his tormentor’s pleasure.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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