Artists -- Relations with women -- Fiction; Artists -- United States -- Fiction
After the performance he guided her through the surging crowds to a
North Division Street car--they had laid cables since his arrival--and
together they went over the beauties and humor of the thing they had
seen. He asked permission to call again next day, and at the end of an
afternoon in her company, proposed that they go to hear a famous
preacher who was speaking in Central Music Hall evenings.
Angela was pleased at Eugene's resourcefulness. She wanted to be with
him; this was a good excuse. They went early and enjoyed it. Eugene
liked the sermon as an expression of youth and beauty and power to
command. He would have liked to be an orator like that, and he told
Angela so. And he confided more and more of himself to her. She was
impressed by his vivid interest in life, his selective power, and felt
that he was destined to be a notable personality.
There were other meetings. She came again in early November and before
Christmas and Eugene was fast becoming lost in the meshes of her hair.
Although he met Ruby in November and took up a tentative relation on a
less spiritual basis--as he would have said at the time--he nevertheless
held this acquaintanceship with Angela in the background as a superior
and more significant thing. She was purer than Ruby; there was in her
certainly a deeper vein of feeling, as expressed in her thoughts and
music. Moreover she represented a country home, something like his own,
a nice simple country town, nice people. Why should he part with her, or
ever let her know anything of this other world that he touched? He did
not think he ought to. He was afraid that he would lose her, and he knew
that she would make any man an ideal wife. She came again in December
and he almost proposed to her--he must not be free with her or draw too
near too rapidly. She made him feel the sacredness of love and marriage.
And he did propose in January.
The artist is a blend of subtleties in emotion which can not be
classified. No one woman could have satisfied all sides of Eugene's
character at that time. Beauty was the point with him. Any girl who was
young, emotional or sympathetic to the right degree and beautiful would
have attracted and held him for a while. He loved beauty--not a plan of
life. He was interested in an artistic career, not in the founding of a
family. Girlhood--the beauty of youth--was artistic, hence he craved it.
Angela's mental and emotional composition was stable. She had learned to
believe from childhood that marriage was a fixed thing. She believed in
one life and one love. When you found that, every other relationship
which did not minister to it was ended. If children came, very good; if
not, very good; marriage was permanent anyhow. And if you did not marry
happily it was nevertheless your duty to endure and suffer for whatever
good might remain. You might suffer badly in such a union, but it was
dangerous and disgraceful to break it. If you could not stand it any
more, your life was a failure.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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