The Gentle Art of Cooking WivesWorthington, Elizabeth Strong
General
The Gentle Art of Cooking Wives
Worthington, Elizabeth Strong
Marriage
The calm of the succeeding twenty-four hours was but that which
precedes the storm, and the glassy placidity of Steve's life for that
one day proved to be the deceitful stillness of deep waters. Upon his
return from the city he was again greeted with the welcome
intelligence that Sarah Maria had raised her head, adjusted her hind
legs, whose hinges, owing to much kicking, had been reversed of late,
and betaken herself to parts unknown. Worn out as he was with the
events of the past week, Steve was unequal to a discreet concealment
of his feelings, and the satisfaction he evinced in Nannie's news was
stoutly resented by that singular young person. Indeed, she became so
wrought up--crying, upbraiding, and lamenting--that Steve was obliged
to console her by promising to advertise the errant beast if she were
not found at her usual trysting-place--the railroad track. This he
did, repeating the dose daily for a week, at the end of which time he
received word that Sarah Maria had temporarily located herself on a
farm some forty miles inland. Not being well disposed to a walk of
that length, enlivened by Sarah Maria's society, Steve sent word to
forward the lady by freight.
Owing to some mistake her car was switched off about ten miles from
the proper station, and thinking that he could bridge that distance,
Steve set out on a train early the next evening, and soon found
himself in reach of the missing member of his household. She was
looking out of the freight car when he arrived, and he noted with a
secret qualm that she shook her head disapprovingly when she saw him.
Steve stood and gazed at her for so long that the man in charge there
finally asked him what he was waiting for. Steve replied that she
looked so happy it seemed a pity to disturb her. The man said that he
didn't regard her as particularly happy, inasmuch as she had all but
kicked out one side of the car. Upon hearing which, Steve hastened to
assure him that that was merely a playful way of hers when her
spirits were at the highest, but the man said that her spirits were
several feet too high for him, and he insisted upon lowering them to
_terra firma_. He was so firm and so disagreeable about this that
Steve was obliged to advance and join him in the difficult
undertaking.
It might seem reasonable to expect that as long as Sarah Maria had
testified vigorously to her disapproval of the freight car she would
be glad to issue from it, and no doubt that would have been the case
had Steve and the station master urged her to remain. The moment,
however, that she saw with her eagle eye that they were making
preparations for her ejectment, her mind was made up, and she spread
her four feet in a manner suggestive of rocks that refuse to fly.
The unhappy men now united their efforts at pulling, but her roots had
evidently gone down to China without stopping; next they endeavored to
pry her up, but she was manifestly stuck by some glue of unparalleled
strength.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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