Women -- Great Britain; Women -- Social conditions
hollow image, for no discovery is more disillusioning; nor must she
officiously intervene if the hardy growing intellect demands a directer
communication with the source of all wisdom. The temptation to say:
“don’t bother Daddy, he’s busy” is not always due to entirely unselfish
promptings. It is better for a child that the direct revelations should
come in the shape of mysteriously expressed riddles than that they
should be repressed by intervention from the sanctuary, for the riddle,
if a good one, may bear unconscious fruit, whereas silence may lead
to disappointment and an estrangement which can never afterwards be
overcome. There are fathers who, at a certain stage, can step blandly
down from the high place, incarnating themselves as it were, and take
the novice by the hand which will rest in his as long as may be: there
are other fathers who can never quite leave the steps of their own
altar. The difference is a matter of temperament. Yet, in either case,
the ultimate relations between father and children will depend upon
the mother’s tact, sympathy, and power of divination in the earliest
stages. Any flaw in her own understanding will here be visited with
punishment.
The Englishwoman brings a considerable amount of acumen into her
parental interpretership, though it consists, perhaps, more in her
acute comprehension of a child’s imagination than in profundity of
psychological analysis of her husband’s character. She has a natural
gift for attaining the confidence of children, putting things to them
in the manner least calculated to cause doubt or dismay. Her own
illogical mind protects them from the devastating effects of logic
upon too tender susceptibilities. I remember so well a father who
set out one winter’s evening in pure kindness of heart to teach two
daughters the rudiments of whist. All went well, if rather silently,
till an awful moment when in a majestic voice—intended purely as a
warning and not as a reproof—the father uttered the words: “Why on
earth did you trump your partner’s best card?” The reply was a flood
of tears and a hasty call for female intervention. Mother would have
conveyed the warning with less emphasis and more prolixity, but she
would have preserved a disposition for whist which was then and there
for ever shattered. These are the domestic pitfalls against which she
has to guard, as the speaking tube through which father and children
communicate, a speaking tube shortening ever with the years till its
use becomes quite unnecessary.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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