ALCAR. I am Lord Leonard Alcar? JANET. My mistake! (They shake hands.) But why does this young man call me Mrs. X. I told him Carve, plain enough. ALCAR. Did he? A slip--a slip! You've brought your husband? JANET. Yes, but not so easily as all that. I'm afraid he's quarrelling out there with Mr. Cyrus Carve. They get across one another on the stairs. ALCAR. Tut-tut. Excuse me one moment. (Exit hurriedly.) (Exit SERVANT.) JANET. Mr. Ebag! So you're here too! Why, it's a family party. EBAG. (Astounded.) How do you do, Mrs. Shawn? I beg pardon, Mrs. Carve. JANET. It seems I'm Mrs. X now--didn't you hear? EBAG. I expect the servant had received instructions. His lordship has a great reputation for wit, you know. JANET. (Looking round.) And what's this room supposed to be? EBAG. Oh, the study, probably. JANET. Really! Not what you'd call 'homely,' is it? Rather like being on the stage. (Enter LORD LEONARD ALCAR, leading CARVE on his right and CYRUS on his left. Servant closes door from without.) ALCAR. Now we're all safely here, and I fancy there will be enough easy-chairs to go round. Mr. Texel, you already know Mr. Cyrus Carve, and you will be pleased to meet the talented artist who painted the pictures which you have been buying from Mr. Ebag. He has most kindly consented to be called Mr. X for the moment. This is Mrs. X, Mr. Texel. (They bow--CYRUS shakes hands with TEXEL.) EBAG. (To CYRUS.) How d'you do? CYRUS. How d'you do? CARVE. How d'you do? ALCAR. (Observing that these three are already acquainted.) Good! Excellent! Now, Mrs.--er--X, will you have this chair near the fire? (Fixes chair for her.) TEXEL. (Indicating JANET, aside to EBAG.) Good looking? EBAG. (Aside to TEXEL.) Very agreeable little thing! TEXEL. Excellent! Excellent! ALCAR. (Interrupting a gesture from CARVE.) You have all done me a signal favour by coming here. In thanking you, I wonder if I may ask another favour. May I? TEXEL. Certainly. Among kindred spirits. EBAG. Assuredly, my lord. ALCAR. I would merely request you to control so far as possible any expression of your astonishment at meeting one another here. That is to say, any violent expression. CARVE. (Gaily and carelessly.) Oh, very well! Very well! (LORD LEONARD ALCAR waves the rest of the company into chairs, tactfully separating CYRUS and CARVE as much as possible. He remains standing himself.) JANET. I suppose what you really want is to stop this funny trial from coming on. ALCAR. (Slightly taken aback.) Mrs. X, I congratulate myself on your presence here. Yes, my ambition is to be peacemaker. Of course a peacemaker always runs the risk of a broken head, but I shall entrust my head to your good nature. As a proof that I really mean business, I need only point out that I haven't invited a single lawyer. EBAG. (After slight pause.) This is exceedingly good of your lordship.