The Great Keinplatz Experiment and Other Tales of Twilight and the UnseenDoyle, Arthur Conan
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The Great Keinplatz Experiment and Other Tales of Twilight and the Unseen
Doyle, Arthur Conan
Fiction; Short stories, English
Whilst in that comfortable lethargic condition which accompanies both
digestion and poisoning by nicotine, I suddenly became aware of the
extraordinary fact that my little drawing-room had elongated into a
great _salon_, and that my humble table had increased in proportion.
Round this colossal mahogany were seated a great number of people who
were talking earnestly together, and the surface in front of them was
strewn with books and pamphlets. I could not help observing that these
persons were dressed in a most extraordinary mixture of costumes, for
those at the end nearest to me wore peruke wigs, swords, and all the
fashions of two centuries back; those about the centre had tight
knee-breeches, high cravats, and heavy bunches of seals; while among
those at the far side the majority were dressed in the most modern
style, and among them I saw, to my surprise, several eminent men of
letters whom I had the honour of knowing. There were two or three women
in the company. I should have risen to my feet to greet these unexpected
guests, but all power of motion appeared to have deserted me, and I
could only lie still and listen to their conversation, which I soon
perceived to be all about myself.
“Egad!” exclaimed a rough, weather-beaten man, who was smoking a long
church-warden pipe at my end of the table, “my heart softens for him.
Why, gossips, we’ve been in the same straits ourselves. Gadzooks, never
did mother feel more concern for her eldest born than I when Rory Random
went out to make his own way in the world.”
“Right, Tobias, right!” cried another man, seated at my very elbow. “By
my troth, I lost more flesh over poor Robin on his island, than had I
the sweating sickness twice told. The tale was well-nigh done when in
swaggers my Lord of Rochester--a merry gallant, and one whose word in
matters literary might make or mar. ‘How now, Defoe,’ quoth he, ‘hast a
tale on hand?’ ‘Even so, your lordship,’ I returned. ‘A right merry one,
I trust,’ quoth he. ‘Discourse unto me concerning thy heroine, a comely
lass, Dan, or I mistake.’ ‘Nay,’ I replied, ‘there is no heroine in the
matter.’ ‘Split not your phrases,’ quoth he; ‘thou weighest every word
like a scald attorney. Speak to me of thy principal female character, be
she heroine or no.’ ‘My lord,’ I answered, ‘there is no female
character.’ ‘Then out upon thyself and thy book too!’ he cried. ‘Thou
hadst best burn it!’--and so out in great dudgeon, whilst I fell to
mourning over my poor romance, which was thus, as it were, sentenced to
death before its birth. Yet there are a thousand now who have heard of
Robin and his man Friday, to one who has heard of my Lord of Rochester.”
“Very true, Defoe,” said a genial-looking man in a red waistcoat, who
was sitting at the modern end of the table. “But all this won’t help our
good friend Smith in making a start at his story, which, I believe, was
the reason why we assembled.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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