The Greatest Plague of Life: or, the Adventures of a Lady in Search of a Good Servant.Mayhew, Henry
General
The Greatest Plague of Life: or, the Adventures of a Lady in Search of a Good Servant.
Mayhew, Henry
English wit and humor; Household employees
Concerning Norah, however, she said it was quite a different thing, and
that she felt no such delicacy about taking that matter in hand, as,
from the experience she had had in the management of servants, (which,
of course, Mr. Sk--n--st--n could not possibly understand anything
about, or he would have known that kindness was utterly thrown away upon
the creatures,) she flattered herself that she would very soon bring the
woman to her senses, indeed. So she would slip her things on that very
moment, and step round with me to Miss Norah, although I told her that
she was too good to me, and that I was afraid that I was riding the
willing horse to death when I saddled her with the baggage.
When we reached our cottage _orné_, I allowed dear mother to go down
into the kitchen by herself, thinking it best not to interfere between
her and that spitfire of a Norah, as there was no knowing what the
consequences might be. I shouldn’t think she could have been away five
minutes, when up she came rushing into the room, with her face as white
as the head of a cauliflower, and all of a tremble, just like a
steam-boat. As soon as she had recovered her breath, (which indeed, has
been bad for these many years past,) she declared that it was quite a
mercy she had even been able to escape with her life up the kitchen
stairs, as she never had stood face to face with such a fury in all her
born days before; for directly she told the woman that she ought to be
ashamed of herself for the way in which she had treated so kind a
mistress, and that, for her part, she only wished that she had the
management of her, and she would take good care to rule her with a rod
of iron,--when, no sooner had she said as much, than the dragon screamed
out, “A rod of iron, is it?” and snatching up the heavy kitchen poker,
swore that, by the powers, if mother didn’t lave the kitchen directly,
she would crack her ugly ould nob for her like a cocoa-nut, saying the
likes of her had no rights in the kitchen at all at all, and she’d just
tache her not to put her foot in it agin. Then she twisted about the
great heavy kitchen poker over her head, and began capering and
screaming away, and then, giving vent to a horrible oath, the fury flew
after poor dear mother, and followed her half way up the kitchen stairs;
and mother said she really believed if the vixen could have caught hold
of her, that she would have been a melancholy corpse that
moment--adding, that if she were me, she would go down stairs that very
minute, and turn the blood-thirsty tigress out of the house, neck and
crop. When I very properly observed, that as she had so kindly
undertaken the management of the creature for me, I felt I should not
like to take it out of her hands, she said that as Norah Connor seemed
to object very naturally to her interference, she would have nothing
more to do with her--as, upon second thoughts, it certainly was no place
of hers.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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