The Hampstead mystery: a novel. Volume 2 (of 3)Marryat, Florence
General
The Hampstead mystery: a novel. Volume 2 (of 3)
Marryat, Florence
Fiction
‘I have not come to ask anything of you, Fred,’ said Rhoda, in a
reproachful voice. ‘I think you might know that without my telling you.
I am here as your friend only. I heard that you were in trouble, and I
wanted to see if I could be of any use to you.’
‘Thank you, thank you,’ he replied nervously. ‘It is kind of you to
have thought of it. Won’t you sit down?’
Rhoda seated herself on one of the rush-bottomed chairs, whilst
Frederick took another as far as possible from her.
‘What is it that I can do for you?’ he commenced, in a stiff voice.
‘Nothing,’ replied the girl, ‘only tell me about yourself. Is it true
that you are a widower? I am so sorry for you! And why are you living
in this place? What have you to do with a training college?’
‘I am here as a probationer, or novice, Rhoda. It is evident you know
nothing about me. I am about to enter the Church and become a priest.’
‘A priest! Oh, Fred, never! _You_ a priest? You’ll never stick to it.
You will be tired to death of it in three months.’
This prophecy seemed to offend the young man exceedingly, the more so
as he had occasional doubts whether it might not be true.
‘You do not know what you are talking of,’ he returned,
grandiloquently. ‘A priest once is a priest for ever. There will be no
going back. Once ordained, my fate is fixed for life.’
‘Will there be _no_ getting out of it; not even if you thought it
right?’ exclaimed Rhoda, with open eyes.
‘Certainly not. Once admitted to the Church, there can be no leaving
her without everlasting disgrace and loss of one’s salvation.’
‘Oh, Fred!’ cried the girl, ‘think twice before you take such an
irrevocable step. You will repent it; I am sure you will. But what made
you think of it? What put such an idea into your head?’
‘The Almighty, in His infinite goodness,’ replied Frederick. ‘You have
heard, you say, of my great loss. It was that which first brought me to
my senses. It was so sudden--so terrible! I could see God’s finger of
wrath so plainly in it, that it mercifully opened my eyes to my true
condition.’
‘Do you think, then,’ said the girl, timidly, ‘that God revenges
Himself on us for our petty, thoughtless sins, by torturing or cutting
off the life of some one we love? If _you_ were the sinner, why should
_she_ have died to bring you to a sense of your wickedness? Why should
an innocent girl be used as a burnt-offering for your sins? And how
can you better matters by becoming a priest? Are there not plenty of
priests? Is it impossible to show God that you are sorry for the past
in some other way?’
‘Rhoda, as you truly say, you do not understand. You have not been
brought up in our blessed faith. I wish you had. Then you would know
there is no expiation for sin without blood shedding. When my beloved
wife was taken from me I was nearly mad--’
‘Tell me of her,’ interposed Rhoda, softly. ‘I would rather hear about
her than the Church.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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